Miscellaneous: Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband... - FML

By Mariah Heimann - 15/12/2011 03:34 - United States

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 118

You deserved it 3 382

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Same thing different taste

By Jimseagoon - 03/09/2018 20:30

Today, my wife took me to Taco Bell for the first time. I said, "Isn't this where all those FMLs happen to people?" She said, "You'll be fine." I am writing this from the toilet. I am not fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 851

You deserved it 443

By Anonymous - 18/08/2016 20:44 - United States - High Point

Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 344

You deserved it 1 139

It was the painkillers, I swear

By laurenh211 - 17/11/2020 17:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 85

By anonymouss - 24/05/2009 22:14 - United States

Today, I collided heads at a soccer game and needed 13 stitches in my head. I texted all my contacts to let them know I was in the hospital. I got back one response that said "bitch got what you deserve" it was from my cousin. No one else ever texted me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 558

You deserved it 26 371

By man - 08/05/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, I was hit by a car. I called my girlfriend from the hospital and asked her if she could pick me up. She responded by saying "Fuck you, you aways tell me what to do!" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 373

You deserved it 10 388

Supportive

By Anonymous - 28/09/2022 13:00 - United Kingdom - Bury

Today, I was involved in a car crash. When I told him, my boyfriend was more interested in what he was going to have for lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 131

By anon - 31/12/2012 18:13 - United States - Gilroy

Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 243

You deserved it 3 143

By KobraKommander - 17/03/2010 11:51 - France

Today, I rear-ended a car while I was texting about the accident ahead which was causing all the traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 510

You deserved it 92 596

By OH COME ON - 29/12/2011 15:48 - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 758

You deserved it 5 556

By anon - 21/06/2014 12:50 - United States - Edison

Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 928

You deserved it 4 860

Next

Top comments

KristantheGreat 5

Thursday 15 December 2011 8:52

tell him to bring you a taco.

WCARlover 34

Thursday 15 December 2011 8:52

Haha well you were cutting in on the mans meal time!

Comments

brick_man33 14

Thursday 15 December 2011 16:41

When a man wants a Steak XXL Grilled Stuft Burrito, there's no stopping him!.

patriciadusud_fml 8

Thursday 15 December 2011 16:41

Happened to me too. My boyfriend called me to say he was at the hospital.... but I continue talking to him without paying attention or realizing what he just said. For me, he was in front of the hospital so he was going to be late for our rendez-vous.

perdix 29

Thursday 15 December 2011 16:46

He was trying to one-up you in the "who's suffering most" contest. You're getting treated, but he's setting himself up for a night full of stomach cramps and explosive diarrhea.

THE_A_TEEN 27

Thursday 15 December 2011 17:32

If only you would see what tacos do to the bathroom at taco bell. It's like shietnam...

Worth333 0

Thursday 15 December 2011 17:50

hahaha he had to have been high????

blackjewels 2

Thursday 15 December 2011 17:53

Guess who's sleeping on the couch!

hateevryone 14

Thursday 15 December 2011 17:55

tell him to buy you something & get to the damn hospital.

misscami248 6

Thursday 15 December 2011 18:00

Don't worry he'll be at the hospital when he's done eating taco bell... he'll need his stomach pumped

WordSmyth 2

Thursday 15 December 2011 18:17

Grade D meat never tasted better! Mmmm!

rubberduckie94 13

Thursday 15 December 2011 18:26

as a woman i agree. when women understand most men show love through actions not words we shall all live in peice and the unicorn will come back ; )

interexntsc 12

Thursday 15 December 2011 18:48

Well....at least he was thinking outside the box!

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The Top

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 539

You deserved it 51 165

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 711

You deserved it 5 223

The Top

Today, my 7 year old daughter decided to use my laptop without my permission. She accidentally got SpaghettiOs on the screen, then used the hard side of a sponge, filled with soapy water, to scrub both the keyboard and screen of my laptop to clean it off so Mommy wouldn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 617

You deserved it 5 356

Today, I was eating out at a restaurant downtown with my brother in-law when I told him I couldn't eat any more. He then told me, "You better, or you're walking home." He wasn't kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 435

You deserved it 3 593

Today, I looked at a girl's profile on a dating website, and it told her I'd visited it. Later on, she sent me a message. It said: "Don't even think about it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 659

You deserved it 3 801

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 898

You deserved it 9 551

Today, the girl who broke up with me and disappeared 6 years ago wished me a happy Father's Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 451

You deserved it 6 305

Today, while waiting for a job interview, a woman sat down next to me and asked if I was here for the job too. Thinking she was also an applicant, I tried to demoralise her, and said the job was going to be a complete joke. With that, she stood up and said, "Do you still want to go into my office?" She was the interviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 918

You deserved it 77 485