Miscellaneous: Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband...

By Mariah Heimann - 15/12/2011 03:34 - United States

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 118

You deserved it 3 382

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Same thing different taste

By Jimseagoon - 03/09/2018 20:30

Today, my wife took me to Taco Bell for the first time. I said, "Isn't this where all those FMLs happen to people?" She said, "You'll be fine." I am writing this from the toilet. I am not fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 851

You deserved it 443

By Anonymous - 18/08/2016 20:44 - United States - High Point

Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 344

You deserved it 1 139

It was the painkillers, I swear

By laurenh211 - 17/11/2020 17:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 85

By anonymouss - 24/05/2009 22:14 - United States

Today, I collided heads at a soccer game and needed 13 stitches in my head. I texted all my contacts to let them know I was in the hospital. I got back one response that said "bitch got what you deserve" it was from my cousin. No one else ever texted me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 558

You deserved it 26 371

By man - 08/05/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, I was hit by a car. I called my girlfriend from the hospital and asked her if she could pick me up. She responded by saying "Fuck you, you aways tell me what to do!" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 373

You deserved it 10 388

Supportive

By Anonymous - 28/09/2022 13:00 - United Kingdom - Bury

Today, I was involved in a car crash. When I told him, my boyfriend was more interested in what he was going to have for lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 131

By anon - 31/12/2012 18:13 - United States - Gilroy

Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 243

You deserved it 3 143

By KobraKommander - 17/03/2010 11:51 - France

Today, I rear-ended a car while I was texting about the accident ahead which was causing all the traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 510

You deserved it 92 596

By OH COME ON - 29/12/2011 15:48 - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 758

You deserved it 5 556

By anon - 21/06/2014 12:50 - United States - Edison

Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 928

You deserved it 4 860

KristantheGreat 5

Thursday 15 December 2011 8:52

tell him to bring you a taco.

WCARlover 34

Thursday 15 December 2011 8:52

Haha well you were cutting in on the mans meal time!

Comments

GagaForGaga103 1

Friday 16 December 2011 7:01

lol, love it :D

raysfan6006 3

Friday 16 December 2011 7:50

I'm dating his sister

amychelle 4

Friday 16 December 2011 8:01

He was at TACO BELL...nuff' said.

sassypenguinxox 15

Friday 16 December 2011 8:05

Hey, man's gotta eat

peter1983 0

Friday 16 December 2011 20:09

Awesome!!

Kaiiley 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 7:23

Why wouldn't he be there in the first place??!?

imp96_fml 3

Saturday 17 December 2011 14:59

Why in the world would you text if it is something important. I dont blame your husband.

por2gezstud 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 17:24

Well then you should of asked him to get you something, cause hospital food isn't that good.

bribennett22 2

Saturday 17 December 2011 21:53

Was he getting busy on a chalupa

thejedi08 10

Sunday 18 December 2011 10:07

was it because he changed the GPS to sound like Mr. T and you could not figure out how to change it?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 420

Today, my girlfriend, for our first time having sex, wanted to do stepbrother roleplay. Not only is that odd for our first time, it’s a weird fetish to have, especially when she actually does have a stepbrother. We ended up not finishing having sex, it was too weird for me FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 956

You deserved it 279

The Top

Today, after I told my roommate last week she needed to find a new place to live because I thought she was psychotic, she set my house on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 149

Today, I put scribbles, lines, shapes and random words on my calendar just to make it seem like I was busy. This isn't the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 996

You deserved it 9 006

Today, I was changing my shirt in the bathroom when I dropped it. It fell on my foot, so I decided to flip it up with my foot instead of bending down to get it. I flipped it, and it landed in the toilet. Which somebody had not flushed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 346

You deserved it 35 656

Today, I realized my recent weight loss probably wasn't caused by working out and eating more healthily. It was from the tapeworm I discovered hanging out my ass after I took a crap. I had to pull it out with my bare hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 561

You deserved it 4 081

Today, I was at work, finishing a presentation for my boss. Five minutes after I presented it to him, his boss walked in and asked for the same presentation I had just given. My boss presented it. His boss then turned to me and asked me, "What use are you around here?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 745

You deserved it 2 877

Today, I was talking to a guy I really liked, hoping that he would ask me out. Eventually he asked for my number. I was so excited that I couldn't remember it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 205

You deserved it 8 616

Same thing different taste

It was the painkillers, I swear

Supportive

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