Poopoo peepee and Love: Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered... - FML

By Crashburn - 16/01/2012 11:09 - United Kingdom

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 872

You deserved it 15 390

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Same thing different taste

Let it all out

By pottypattypeepants - 31/12/2009 20:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 682

You deserved it 19 645

By Rella - 15/12/2018 03:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the 69 position with me on top and as we changed positions, and I turned to face him, I saw toilet paper on his face that he didn't seem to notice and that I casually had to wipe off his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 030

You deserved it 1 307

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 155

You deserved it 6 016

By anti-peecleaner - 22/11/2010 22:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 444

You deserved it 5 234

Marking territory

By Anonymous - 02/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, while on a picnic with my boyfriend, he got a little drunk. All of a sudden, he got up, pulled his pants down and pissed all over me. His excuse? "Just marking my territory." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 748

You deserved it 335

By marsbar - 15/03/2009 05:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 735

You deserved it 20 103

Toot toot

By gassy - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 249

You deserved it 36 065

By Angry - 04/08/2009 20:21 - United States

Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 917

You deserved it 7 190

Dirty sex

By Anonymous - 20/11/2022 06:00 - Canada - Burlington

Today, I was in my girlfriend's room when she walked in after getting out of the shower, wearing just a towel. She removed it and I was inches away from going down on her when I noticed she hadn’t wiped properly, either before or after her shower. She'd complained about stomach problems earlier, but regardless… FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 127

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 295

You deserved it 7 527

Next

Top comments

bene201 0

Monday 16 January 2012 16:11

Shit happens

rckstrtmmy 4

Monday 16 January 2012 16:12

YDI for dating a dirty bastard.

Comments

o0malicecat0o 4

Tuesday 17 January 2012 1:23

O barf! That's so not cool! Does he not know how to wipe?

crammer1 6

Tuesday 17 January 2012 1:28

I would have told him it was chocolate and have him lick it off! Would serve him right!

reldnahceus 8

Tuesday 17 January 2012 1:28

Eww!

mborrie 1

Tuesday 17 January 2012 1:33

ewww, thats just nasty

liv4theearth 13

Tuesday 17 January 2012 2:09

I feel like he might have done that on purpose.

Neuhisstihr 0

Tuesday 17 January 2012 2:23

That's just nasty lol

bubo_fml 10

Tuesday 17 January 2012 2:40

From Scat to the Cat!!

redmnky21 8

Tuesday 17 January 2012 3:04

that's hot! give him a Cleveland steamer in return!!!

destinydias 0

Tuesday 17 January 2012 3:29

Shit happens!! Next time tell him to wipe his ass and stop acting like a little kid and not wipe after taking a shit!!!!!!! :)

ethan1398 2

Tuesday 17 January 2012 3:35

Thats gross

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I’m 15 and my mother banned me from watching YouTube because it’s "distracting." What the f***? How? Now I have to pretend that I've watched the things my friends send me so they won’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143

You deserved it 439

Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 876

You deserved it 2 095

The Top

Today, I had sex with a guy on the first date. I couldn’t wait, he was too gorgeous. The only problem was that when we finished, he announced that he had to fart and did so twice. Now I’m not so sure if I’ll see him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 231

You deserved it 7 117

Today, I'm such a lightweight that after a single can of 3.2% alcohol, I was sobbing uncontrollably over the death of a fictional character, who wasn't even permanently dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 448

Today, I had a cyst in my butt removed. The doctors had to make a hole, and then fill it with gauze before sending me home. As soon as I got back, my sister decided to kick me in the butt as hard as she could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 124

You deserved it 1 976

Today, I tried to organise my closet by colour-coding my clothes. In the process, I accidentally knocked over a shelf, creating an avalanche of mismatched shoes. I now have a closet that looks like it barely survived an earthquake in Selfridges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 299

You deserved it 242

Today, my nutjob girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my best friend, just because she's a woman. Before she left, my now-ex decided to punish me by destroying the dissertation I've spent months working on, along with both backups of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 603

You deserved it 4 668

Today, I let my friend bleach my hair, which resulted in it falling out in clumps. I spent $150 at the beauty salon fixing it and cutting most of it off. I sent the pictures of my new hair to my friends, and I got the same reply from each and every one of them: "That better be a wig." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 325

You deserved it 30 353