Toot toot

By gassy - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
I agree, your life sucks 15 249
You deserved it 36 065
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Top comments

rattusrattus 18

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASP! You can't let your boyfriend know that you're a human being with bodily functions! He will never want one of those! Your relationship is doomed! *clutches pearls, swoons*

190 12

Comments

lilhellian 26

Omg did nike make them.. They are so like gonna be the latest fad.. Where can I get a pair...

porcupineattack1 5

Listen man i know you saw your chance for the first comment but if you got nothin just don't comment.

1 2
asnakelovinbabe 16

#8 I love your pic. That is all.

0 1
iOceanus 18

19: There's this thing on the internet, don't know if you've heard, it's called sarcasm.

80 5
Harpy20 24

Girl's don't fart! Lies built on LIES.

4 0
camsterjoe 12

The invisa-shoe! For three payments of $19.95 you too can blame your shoes on social accidents. Call now and you will get the invisa-socks to go with your new shoes!

54 2
ironichalibut 24

They're spray on shoes, I swear! They're totally real, I saw it on the Internet.

21 6
igive 29

At first I thought you were talking about the farts being invisible.

6 33
wlddog 14

70, How often are your farts visible?

49 0
tjv3 10

People fart that's life . If you hold it in then you will just let it all out when you sleep

4 1
asnakelovinbabe 16

Hi, BILLY MAYS HERE WITH ANOTHER AMAZING PRODUCT!

7 2
klimpomppp 9

90-mine are just a green fog...why do you ask?

3 2
jawztheshark 6

Maybe you shouldn't feed your shoes so many beans

107 3
ICastillo 24

Beans, beans the magical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot!!

12 2
CheeseTron 15

Bla bla.. Electric eel.. Bla bla bla window seal!

8 2
iammeorami 25

holy **** cake your totally right

0 4
Twisted_Angel 17

Lmfao!!! I can only imagine what the look on his face was... now he just thinks your feet smell like ass. good work.

2 54
zingline89 18

"Oh and I was making egg salad too before you got here. "

54 3
jetsown08 21

I don't think her boyfriend will be interested in any salad after this, even if it's tossed.

0 8
rattusrattus 18

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASP! You can't let your boyfriend know that you're a human being with bodily functions! He will never want one of those! Your relationship is doomed! *clutches pearls, swoons*

190 12
zombieslayer83 19

After all everyone poops, Well poots, in this case.

33 3
rogerdodgeroz 4

Yeah girls don't fart ..

7 20
Judahsh 8

Might be true, he knows she does, yet its impolite.

0 2
happle 21

I'll think twice before letting gas escape my body next time.

3 1
teareb 9

Maybe not the best excuse, but don't worry about it everyone farts it's only natural.

19 3
ICastillo 24

Aww screw it OP when you have to drop a bomb, well bombs away.

21 5
mydadpulledout 17

come on noor, I hold you to a higher standard of commenting than that!

7 3
Omfgitsmia 15

Well, everyone does it. That is embarrassibg though. You'll laugh about it later.

10 15
happle 21

"Hey babe, remember that time I farted? Lololol" So classy.

7 1