Work: Today, after I had finished vacuuming, I ripped the cord out... - FML

By Clutz - 25/10/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, after I had finished vacuuming, I ripped the cord out of the outlet and it hit me in the face cutting both my top and bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 421

You deserved it 35 897

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By ouch - 12/12/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 944

You deserved it 41 956

Proper job

By So so close to clean - 08/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, with words of encouragement from my mom, I vacuumed my room. After finishing and admiring my job well done, I went to put the vacuum away. It caught on the plug for my electric razor which was dangling below the dresser and yanked that and everything else that was on top of it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 413

You deserved it 1 292

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 569

You deserved it 13 140

By tikizombie - 30/08/2010 20:10 - Canada

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 210

You deserved it 8 402

Night fight

By FistFighter - 09/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 938

You deserved it 12 978

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 014

You deserved it 9 307

By Anonymous - 25/07/2015 04:20 - United States - Tempe

Today, after vacuuming, I struggled to pull the nozzle attachment out. I yanked it too hard and it flew out, hitting me in the face and causing my head to jerk back into the wall behind me. My girlfriend had to drive me to the hospital for my concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 300

You deserved it 3 307

Self report

By Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 186

By BloodyNoseMcgee - 11/10/2018 15:30

Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 998

You deserved it 181

Rude awakening

By oww - 15/11/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 254

You deserved it 3 399

Next

Top comments

xCrackerx 3

Sunday 25 October 2009 9:25

You're the kind of person who forced McDonalds to put WARNING: HOT on every cup of coffee.

xshyguyx 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 8:41

next time don't yank the cord, lesson learned

Comments

thenewbroly 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 9:40

Oh well im sorry that happened I hope you get better soon. And I guess that's one way to learn not to do that. And including doing that will make the vacuum not work so well believe me I had to find that out the hard way when one of the wires that I did that too like became very sensitive because I did the same thing you did and in the end I had to buy a new vacuum.

st87 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 9:59

wish i was there... to see that thing about your top ;-)

nokillnobeepbeep 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 10:31

That is just god saying you are terrible at sucking. Just trying to do the men in your life a favor.

Bloodknight 22

Sunday 25 October 2009 10:33

Haha that ***** hilarious!

albinoV 1

Sunday 25 October 2009 10:46

You can damage the cord pulling it out that way. That why the plug has a convenient grip on it.

HappyCatIsHappy 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 10:52

YDI - Don't yank the cord out like that. It might not only hit you in the face, but damage the cord inside.

Nocturnal558 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 11:33

FYL, vacuums are mean

WorkThatButt 2

Sunday 25 October 2009 12:01

Bitch why'd you yank it out you lazy ass? Couldn't you just do it the human way? YDI

TrippingOverAir 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 12:19

*gasp* The electronics are attacking! Technology has turned against us! ... No wait, actually the OP is just an idiot.

shakenbake93 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 12:58

You shouldve listened to mom

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Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, my longtime crush, who turned me down because he’s “sick of women”, just got into a relationship. He made it Facebook official, with photos of them and everything. Wanting to even the score, I commented, “So it seems your sickness of women is cured, huh?” He bitched at me for “ruining his moment” and deleted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 990

Today, at my sister's engagement party, my cousins thought it would be funny to get my nanna drunk. They regretted it when she told them, and everyone else at the party about her sex life and how she fakes orgasms with my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 294

You deserved it 9 653

The Top

Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 877

You deserved it 3 425

Today, I was reading a romance story about a couple that fights, but gets back together and works out their issues. I was rooting for the breakup because I've become so cynical, I think forgiveness is weak and trust is for suckers. Yup, I'm now heartless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 490

Today, after struggling to fall asleep due to stress, my cat decided to wake me up by standing on me and meowing until I got up. Just for me to show him that my boyfriend had already put food in his dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 167

Today, after cleaning my mom’s bathroom, I wiped the molding strip along the wall so it was even. A quite precariously-hung potted plant thought that reason enough to fall right on top of me, spreading dirt over the entire room as well as my hair, my sweater, and the inside of my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 127

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 892

You deserved it 12 694

Today, my dog chewed up my $120 dildo. Goodbye, sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 500

You deserved it 5 519