The "maybe you'll change your mind" thing gets really old to hear. True or not, it comes off as invalidating someone's current position.

I'd say I agree if we were putting that as "who cares it's my life and my choices" but if everyone's opinions always changing is a reason to not care then what's the point of sharing them in the first place? Obviously they're affecting OP now. Women all over the place are disregarded because of their decision not to have children at any time of life.

Because that's a part of life? Because it's joining in on a conversation? Because if no one ever spoke how they feel nothing would get accomplished?

Or, y'know, we could just respect OP's opinion /now/ rather than imitate her peers and tell her that her current opinion is invalid? Just because time passes doesn't mean the values of the present moment mean nothing.

Exactly the point I was getting at. Thank you, 22!

Okay well if you actually read my initial comment I didn't "invalidate" her opinion. I said that every single persons opinion in the group could possibly change, therefore OP shouldn't feel bad that her friends are disgusted with her. I simply took the current scenario that OP is in and gave an example of an exact opposite possible end result.

#20 the way you phrase it sounds like you are saying it doesn't matter what her opinion is. You don't know if her opinion will change over time or not. She may have reasons she doesn't want kids and may never change her stance on that. It's important because it affects her life and goals which I imagine are important to her. I'm honestly not sure exactly how you meant this to come off, but just saying her opinion should matter because it matters to her.

#22, did you just "not all x" this...

Whoop, #25. This is why spiders shouldn't type. Too many limbs.

12, I am taking several medications that are keeping me mentally stable which I would have to discontinue during pregnancy, so as far as I'm concerned, pregnancy is out. Also, and I know this is very un-PC to say, I hate...yes, hate...babies and toddlers. I have ever since I was old enough to have strong feelings on anything. I'm 30 now, so assume that this has been for the last 26 or 27 years. I think it's highly unlikely that I'm going to change my mind in the next ten years in which I could realistically assume I'd be able to get pregnant, since that would be flying in the face of opinions I have held for all of my conscious existence. Why are you assuming that OP doesn't have similarly entrenched reasons? Trust me, most people who are childfree have given a lot of thought to being that way, knowing the flak they're likely to get for saying that they are out loud.

It's opinions like that which prevent me from getting a tubal ligation, because despite my abject disgust and fear of pregnancy and my lifelong hatred of babies and small children, I "might change my mind."

141, I know the feeling all too well. Sucks to be us!

141: My aunt tried to get her tubes tied when she was in her late teens, and the doctor refused saying she may change her mind and he didn't want to deal with a lawsuit. She's in her forties now, and doctors still refused to give her the surgery. Instead, my uncle went and got a vasectomy.

I really hope you don't want children later in life now, that's kinda dumb so early in life in my opinion cuz you could change your mind when you are older.

Nope. I have felt this way since I was 16. I know what I want

Over 5 years is not enough time to know if you want kids or not. You are still young, so ovbiously when you are young you don't want kids. But what happens when you are 30, married and decide you do want kids? Then you are kind of screwed. IMO you should have waited a few more years for a vasectomy, but hey your body your choice. I'm just putting my two sense in.

It's *cents, and adoption is a thing. If it ever comes to that.

@57 Not everyone has a maternal/paternal instinct, and genetics are overrated; why add to the population problem? #58 is right, there's always adoption if he should ever change his mind, assuming he doesn't end up with someone who already has kids.

#59 while it's true not everyone has the instinct you never know what might happen to awaken it. I once knew a girl who despite a bad situation could not have been happier she was pregnant or more excited for her baby and for some reason I'll never quite understand it opened my mind which had previously been 100% against having kids to now where I still don't want them but if I was with someone who did I would consider it. He may never want kids and that's alright but it's a big step to take this early is all.

It's interesting to me that a guy commented (above) and said "oh you could change your mind" and everyone threw rocks at him because "how dare you say that to a woman." However, when this guy says he knows what he wants and he prevented it from happening, he gets told "oh, well you might change your mind." Can we stop with the double standard? It's his body. Your not having kids with him, so shush.

57, it's actually "cents" for future reference.

#82, I think the main issue people had is that he got a vasectomy at such a young age. Maybe to them, it's comparable to getting a tattoo as soon as you turn 18? I honestly don't care. He can do what he wants as long as it doesn't hurt me or the people around him. In fact, it might be good for society if, later, he decides he wants to adopt.

Hey morons, why don't you stop bashing his decision? Yins are all saying OP has one but not this guy? You can reverse a vasectomy.

Why I honestly don't believe that the people that are telling him it's stupid are just doing it because of his age: My boyfriend has recently gotten a vasectomy, it was a 3 year process which included me having to sign legal documents ALLOWING him to have a vasectomy. Notice that I said boyfriend, I am in no way legally connected to him in any way but he would NOT have gotten his vasectomy without my signature. Can you imagine having your boyfriend co-signing for your birth-control or not getting it? Can you imagine not being able to get an abortion without your fiancée agreeing to it? Can you imagine not getting sterilized yourself without your husband signing the papers? If he was a woman there would be a shitstorm about me having to co-sign in order to let him do what he wants with his body, yet this is a regular practice in my country, no one complaints. I honestly belief the western society conciders reproductive rights to be solely for woman. I honestly belief that when he said he had a vasectomy, people weren't actually thinking 'but what if you change your mind later?' but were thinking 'but what if your future wife wants children?'.

#46, who in their right mind wants kids at age 16 anyway?

21, I'm jealous haha! I'm 26 and don't want kids. However in the US a female has to be at least 30 or already have a kid in order to get her tubes tied. I'm saving up for it. It will be my 30th b-day present to myself. :)

107, I wish you the best of luck. I'm 30 and still can't get my tubes tied, because I'm "too young." Never mind that I was around 21 when I first started asking to get fixed... Good for you, 21.

Not true. I was 25 (no kids) when I got my tube tied and it was super easy. The doctor basically asked a few questions to see if I was serious and scheduled an appointment for a month away.

It might be a function of the sorta-rural area where I live. I might have better luck if I went to a doctor in Denver, the nearest major city, but it's two hours away. Also, I have friends who live there who have had similar experiences to mine. :/

#123: In many cities they won't tie your tubes if you don't have kid.

No if he is certain he does not want them that's perfectly fine my only worry was him deciding this young. And yes to the last few responses the legality of tube tying needs to be changed in a lot of areas. It's kind of a strangely overlooked topic in my opinion and VERY concerning that so many brush off a woman not wanting kids as "she will one day" and don't even give her a chance to make certain she does not have them.

145, I find it very disturbing that doctors won't allow me to make such a "life-changing decision" when in reality, having a baby would be a more life-changing decision...I already know what it's like to live without children, and I wouldn't trade it! And yet, if I got pregnant, doctors would congratulate me and give me advice about pre-natal care, in spite of the fact that I have very good reasons to avoid pregnancy that I stated elsewhere. Though I would get some satisfaction out of cutting them off mid-sentence to tell them that I wanted an abortion.

#151 I am sorry that for some reason that is how the laws are for that system right now. Hopefully as it becomes a bit more accepted that it is common for women not to want children now a days they will HAVE to go in and review it. It is definitely out dated and insulting not to let you have full control over that decision.

#123 My mother was 30 and already had three kids, and the doctor still wouldn't allow her to get her tubes tied, even though she was high risk.

154, it really is ridiculous. I have a guy friend who was 28 when he got a vasectomy, no questions asked. Yet I've seen surveys suggesting that more men than women want children, so wouldn't they be considered riskier potential mind-changers by the same illogic? I wish all doctors were as comfortable with patients' ability to make informed decisions about their own bodies as 123's.

To everyone freaking out... 1. It's his choice. 2. Doc usually makes you freeze some swimmers before snipping you anyway.

that is not true, im 19 and getting mine done in one month, and Medicaid is paying for it. doctors are stubborn about doing it to some one so young, but don't let them bully you out of what you want!

#177: I suggest you go on NARAL prochoice America, or Planned Parenthood page. Many of the women there have been trying for years to get their tubes tied and their doctor won't do it. It is true for many women.