Health and Periods: Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one...

By dynah114 - 27/01/2013 19:08 - Israel - Petah Tiqva

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 351

You deserved it 2 484

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By for fuck's sake, gran - 25/07/2015 05:30 - United States - Bainbridge

Today, my grandma and I went shopping. When I picked up some shower gel, she started ranting in front of everyone that shower gel injures one's "lady parts" and causes infertility, and that she wants me to give her great-grandchildren. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 490

You deserved it 1 778

By fuck you, gran - 09/03/2013 00:38 - United States - Ashland

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 086

You deserved it 4 090

Anatomy lesson

By Anonymous - 13/02/2022 06:00

Today, my mom lost her shit because I was teaching my daughter about tampons. Apparently, they were created by radical feminists to trick women into “stealing” their own virginities, in order to make them unsuitable brides for decent men. I can’t believe I came out of this repressed psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 143

By tamponmayhem - 09/03/2009 19:30 - Canada

Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 205 883

You deserved it 15 419

By Honestly - 09/02/2017 11:00 - United Kingdom - Measham

Today, I had to teach my mother that tampons do not belong in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 011

You deserved it 526

Logic

By tampon of doom - 27/05/2021 14:01

Today, I found out from a cousin why my older aunts treated me so differently when we were growing up. Apparently, my mom told them that when I was 14, I wanted to use tampons instead of pads. According to their backward, archaic logic, that meant I was sexually active. No wonder they hated me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 407

You deserved it 104

By jannister - 13/08/2012 19:25 - Germany - Bad Blankenburg

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 918

You deserved it 2 151

Wisdom

By fiftyshardsofbroccoli - 26/10/2012 17:58 - United States

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 451

You deserved it 3 063

Mad beliefs

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 00:20 - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 257

You deserved it 20 796

Please, no more!

By Cyberella - 17/07/2009 05:36 - Australia

Today, at my sister's engagement party, my cousins thought it would be funny to get my nanna drunk. They regretted it when she told them, and everyone else at the party about her sex life and how she fakes orgasms with my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 299

You deserved it 9 654

CheeseTron 15

Monday 28 January 2013 1:26

Well just don't eat one and put it on Youtube.

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Monday 28 January 2013 3:56

And the funny thing is, she has a boyfriend, while a billion of us perfectly normal girls don't. Let that sink in for a little bit

Comments

slingo234 12

Monday 28 January 2013 5:02

Hey O.P. were u in the kotex commercial? "its 2013 why do these myths still exist"

LarryLaDouche 13

Monday 28 January 2013 5:17

Someone call the police! This tampon stole my virginity!

karlcolt45 19

Monday 28 January 2013 6:31

well that escalated quickly

heavenleigh85 5

Monday 28 January 2013 8:08

Tampons are pretty awful they swell and are sometimes hard to remove I'm 27 and I can't deal with them. Let's not even start with toxic shock syndrome those things terrify me hah

CharresBarkrey 15

Monday 28 January 2013 9:47

Sounds like you just never got used to them. As long as you change them every few hours you don't have to worry about TSS. Honesty, if they're used correctly, you literally can't feel them.

Needafarm 22

Monday 28 January 2013 10:20

You should use the good tampons. Honestly I have used some cheap ones when i really didn't have a choice and yes, the strings break and they do swell a little awkwardly, but they aren't that bad.

Melodija 19

Monday 28 January 2013 9:17

My grandmother did the same thing :L

Needafarm 22

Monday 28 January 2013 10:17

If your grandmother thinks that tampons steal your virginity then she needs a lesson as to how the hymen is broken. It is not via a tampon. I have been using tampons since 1990 and have never had an issue. If you plan to try them again try using the smallest one "light" and working up from there and knowing when to change them so you don't pull out a dry one. I could never stand having blood on my ass and through out my who region there. Hymens can be torn by certain activities other than sex for the first time. Gradual tearing is often never noticed and can make your first time more pleasurable for the both of you. The Hymen breaking is an awful pain from what I have been told.

paintedchocolate 30

Monday 28 January 2013 14:56

And here I was wondering where mine had gone...

10showgirl 16

Monday 28 January 2013 15:50

You should have said, "Too late!"

interesting33 36

Monday 28 January 2013 17:22

They don't steal it - virginity is NOT the hymen breaking. The hymen breaking can show virginity is being lost but it doesn't necessarily mean it has been - tampons don't usually break it anyway - the hymen can break or tear due to many things - even riding a bike on some occasions!! Losing your virginity for a woman is when a penis is put inside her ****** I think - not tampons.