Intimacy: Today, at work, I gave a piece of candy to a co-worker I have...

By Anonymous - 10/12/2014 08:13 - United States - Seaside

Today, at work, I gave a piece of candy to a co-worker I have a crush on. She looked at me weirdly and walked away. I then remembered that my friend wrote "penis" on the wrapper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 101

You deserved it 8 705

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/02/2011 17:15 - Belgium

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 903

You deserved it 4 898

Jot that down

By Anonymous - 30/04/2020 02:00

Today, I wrote my phone number on a Post-it note and gave it to a cute girl at work. She immediately threw it away. In front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 468

You deserved it 1 022

By PentiumBawls8 - 20/01/2010 22:38 - United States

Today, while at my job, I walked past one of my colleagues who has been sick for the past couple of days. She knows that I'm a tea drinker and asked me for a tea bag. While conversing with her, I handed her one and left. I then later realized that I gave her a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 168

You deserved it 32 935

By Anonymous - 24/05/2011 04:38

Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 527

You deserved it 3 833

By Anonymous - 29/10/2010 23:53 - United States

Today, I sent the girl I like a Twinkie with a note saying "Enjoy! You deserve it". I found out later through an angry email that someone had written "you damn fatty" on the end of the note. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 180

You deserved it 6 920

By emselin - 18/09/2012 20:07 - Denmark - Niv

Today, someone brought cake to class. Trying to get some attention from the guy I have a crush on, I asked if he wanted my piece of cake. He accepted it, and then offered it to another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 692

You deserved it 5 024

Hey you

By pappy - 03/05/2019 13:00 - United States - Lees Summit

Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 961

You deserved it 317

By SaraSkyWolf - 17/10/2018 22:00

Today, we didn't have much to do at work, so I struck up a conversation with a coworker I have a crush on - a girl with one arm. I wanted to tell her I thought she was pretty, but I ended up saying I thought she looked like a pirate queen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 820

You deserved it 1 291

Never do this

By Anonymous - 05/07/2015 06:18 - United States - Cranford

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 416

You deserved it 3 156

By ballthlete - 06/09/2015 04:55 - United States - Edmond

Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 459

You deserved it 13 145

tzemmy 25

Wednesday 10 December 2014 16:18

so you kept the candy bar at work, and somehow didn't see or remember the word penis on it before giving it to your crush?

Standupmast3r 18

Wednesday 10 December 2014 16:21

You just gave your crush your penis. You should be happy.

Comments

danimal_crackerz 26

Wednesday 10 December 2014 21:18

iamsofuckedupla 19

Wednesday 10 December 2014 21:25

More importantly, what kind of candy?

AlwaysWatching 27

Wednesday 10 December 2014 23:03

Well, that's one way to try to speed things up

Murkyy 15

Thursday 11 December 2014 0:36

Your friend needs to stop dicking around

rockydify 22

Thursday 11 December 2014 1:12

Oh yeah ... you 'accidentally' forgot it was written there. Smooth man, smooth.

Kyp_kingofhearts 12

Thursday 11 December 2014 8:25

Crush? What are you, 5?

NodakN8V 25

Thursday 11 December 2014 15:07

Sometimes blunt is the better approach

L00py47 2

Thursday 11 December 2014 22:24

Sounds like OP had an unlucky game of candy/crush saga

ThePols 11

Friday 12 December 2014 5:07

Nothing like being labelled the office rapist.

zman64 9

Friday 12 December 2014 21:55

The worst type of Candy Crush.

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 3 868

You deserved it 295

Today, I was finishing a conversation with my husband. His phone rang, but he didn't take it. He said, "No, the guy said he was going to call me at 11:30 and it's 11:36. I'll call him in 3 minutes." It was then I realized that I have been the subject of this type of petty control for over 30 years. FML

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You deserved it 91

The Top

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You deserved it 4 051

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I agree, your life sucks 11 563

You deserved it 36 613

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I agree, your life sucks 59 695

You deserved it 3 348

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I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 309

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I agree, your life sucks 30 251

You deserved it 3 142

Today, I may be permanently blind in one eye after my girlfriend squirted me with sauce during a playful food fight. She basically used the first bottle she could grab without looking, the extra spicy sauce I make myself that requires gloves, goggles and nose plugs while cooking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 309

You deserved it 547

Same thing different taste

Jot that down

Hey you

Never do this

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