Work: Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard... - FML

By ewewew - 24/09/2009 22:10 - United States

Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard fell into a mass of geese poop. The referee made me put it back in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 440

You deserved it 4 832

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 375

You deserved it 13 546

The name of that old man?

By thisblows - 11/04/2009 20:42 - United States

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 191

You deserved it 5 579

By Anonymous - 12/09/2009 18:58 - United States

Today, I had a soccer game. A player from the other team hit me in the face. In the next half, she was the goalie and I was determined to score on her. When I finally got my chance to, everyone cheered, until I kicked the ball into the goal post and it bounced back and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 867

You deserved it 8 903

By yuck - 09/12/2018 03:30 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was out riding and a seagull pissed on me. It got in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 627

You deserved it 244

By shitlicker - 08/12/2015 04:38 - United States - La Verne

Today, I lost my balance trying to get my bag out of my car. In doing so, my lips came in contact with some bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 182

You deserved it 2 141

By whoops - 09/07/2014 05:38 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 750

You deserved it 20 162

By fml...really - 27/11/2009 07:45 - United States

Today, we took the kids to the local pond near my sister-in-law's to feed the geese. I hadn't been there before, and thought I'd take a picture. I turned around to adjust my camera, but the geese, realizing the feast had ended, took flight. Before I could react I was showered with goose shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 473

You deserved it 4 117

By Anonymous - 20/08/2019 20:00 - Canada

Today, I was refereeing at a kids' soccer tournament and a deer ran across one of the fields. Some of the parents then claimed that a deer on the field meant a free kick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 634

You deserved it 126

By haileyjunkin - 22/11/2011 17:53

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 641

You deserved it 3 307

Riot!

By gmnesbitt - 07/12/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, it was my first time as a hockey referee, for a game played by 7-year-olds. At one point, a little boy tripped another boy. Doing my job, I gave him 2 minutes in the penalty box. After the game, I was attacked by a mob of parents. I was even given an optometrist's business card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 998

You deserved it 2 567

Next

Top comments

boomlol 0

Friday 25 September 2009 1:39

he didnt make you.... and learn the words "**** you"

Rhodacious1 0

Friday 25 September 2009 1:37

EW...

Comments

nixxx90 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 1:02

um YDI for putting it back in your mouth.. fck that I would have NEVER. you could have gotten sick.

rarrigoni 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 4:54

that has got to be some kind of illegal. and you are some kind of stupid for actually doing it.

owtom78 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 17:36

Ew. What the hell is wrong with the ref? I would have refused.

whatever2304 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 18:12

Wow, I always knew Massachucets was big on rules for fh, but I never thought they would go that far...

ban4023 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 21:26

i wouldnt have did it

hollisterlover64 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 21:27

@120, I'm assuming you never had one published?

tayza249 20

Sunday 27 September 2009 2:13

Yuck! No way would I have done that. I would've told the ref no, and shoved the mouth guard in my sock till I got called off. I don't think they could card you for that, so why do it? I guess I'm lucky that the worst thing I've gotten on my mouth guard is sand..

tayza249 20

Sunday 27 September 2009 2:18

Actually I'm a girl who plays field hockey and most of us wear shorts, not kilts. Only one girl in my whole team wears a kilt.

carmal2012 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 6:09

omg thats so nasty, the referee should had let u wash it or something before u put back in ur mouth, aw thats soo sad and gross lol

dalsegno 0

Sunday 27 September 2009 7:36

Umm couldn't you have poured water on it and wiped it off on your shirt? YDI for not thinking.

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Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I called off my engagement because I fell in love with my best friend of 10 years since we recently reconnected. I confessed my feelings to her and asked her out. She rejected me and said she only sees me as a friend. Now I’m completely single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 4 077

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 056

The Top

Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 4 902

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 817

You deserved it 3 554

Today, my crush said that I was exceptionally ordinary. To my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 001

You deserved it 169

Today, I ran over a pothole that was so small it barely qualified as a hole, more like a dent than a hole, but somehow it was still enough to completely crack the rim of my tire and made me 3 hours late to work. I get paid by the hour, so this will hurt my paycheck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 941

You deserved it 164

Today, my ex mother-in-law stupidly made an offhand comment, so I got my kids DNA tested. NONE, I repeat NONE of them is mine. When I think of the thousands I’ve paid in child support I’ll never get back, and now my own mother thinks I’m an asshole for refusing to pay any further. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 149

Today, I got an e-mail from my University saying I may have violated the Student Code of Conduct for being drunk in public at a football game, and now I have to go in to defend myself against charges. My lungs filled with fluid at the game, causing me to throw up. I had to be taken away in an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 793

You deserved it 2 776