Health: Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking,...

By clublulu - 10/04/2009 02:40 - United States

Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking, and accidentally swallowed them. I had to go the emergency room. The nurses at the station laughed at me. They thought it was a joke. They couldn't believe an 18 year old would swallow magnets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 803

You deserved it 77 173

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Same thing different taste

By mimi - 27/09/2011 02:51 - United States

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 683

You deserved it 35 755

By Anonymous - 21/09/2012 04:51 - United States

Today, my five-year-old told me she had accidentally swallowed a thumbtack. In panic mode we raced to the ER. With no insurance. Only after the tests, examinations and X-rays did she tell me was "just joking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 466

You deserved it 3 788

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By Anonymous - 12/05/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As the dentist was working on my teeth, he accidentally sprayed water all over my face. I couldn't stop laughing nervously, which made the dentist think I was choking. He ended up calling for backup and I had to explain that I was just laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 140

Under the hood

By Anonymous - 03/04/2022 12:00

Today, I blanked and forgot to take out my piercing before going for my MRI, even though the nurses asked me multiple times to make sure I had no metal on me before entering, you know, the big machine made of massive electromagnets. The piercing was on my clitoris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 1 691

Stiff upper lip

By Diana - 26/01/2024 00:00 - Germany

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine check-up, and halfway through the appointment, the dentist exclaimed, "Oops!" Turns out, he accidentally glued my lips together while fixing a tiny chip in my front tooth. I spent the next two hours communicating through exaggerated facial expressions and hand gestures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 86

By GogurtBadass - 18/09/2013 16:55 - United States - Olympia

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 674

You deserved it 5 378

By numbtongue - 13/03/2015 04:19 - New Zealand - Dunedin

Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 891

You deserved it 4 468

Numb

By A.J. - 13/04/2019 08:00 - United States

Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 878

You deserved it 173

By navyma - 17/09/2009 05:10 - Korea Republic of

Today, I went to the orthodontist to have my braces worked on. I accidentally swallowed some of the cleaning solution she used. She told me it would probably give me an upset stomach. Apparently, an upset stomach and crapping your pants means the same thing to an orthodontist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 779

You deserved it 4 303

By Anonymous - 26/04/2014 11:36 - United States - Alpharetta

Today, my little brother put a battery to my tongue while I was sleeping with my mouth open. The shock found its way right to my metal filling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 394

You deserved it 3 974

luxor21221 0

Friday 10 April 2009 12:09

You "absent mindedly" put magnets in your mouth........ And then you "accidently" swallowed them....... How do you figure???????????

ScottyD620 0

Friday 10 April 2009 12:14

what's wrong with swallowing magnets? you can walk up to a girl wearing a bunch of jewelry (well maybe really really cheap jewelry thats magnetic) and be like.. "I think there's a connection.. I'm magnetically attracted to you"

Comments

amy_shmamy 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:09

it wouldve been funny if stuff flew to you

hallygators93 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:25

how do you accidentally swallow magnets? -_-"

wrestler93 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:40

i think this was the most pointless fml ive ever seen

AroundtheWorld_fml 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:41

you're dumb.

Mooshki 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:47

You deserved it, but it's still funny.

caheath 0

Friday 10 April 2009 19:48

haha, wow, you stupid shit. next time don't bother with the emergency room, it's called natural selection.

Amkii 0

Friday 10 April 2009 20:34

I was wondering the same thing, #1. Seriously... how do you just accidentally, randomly, decide to put magnets in your mouth, then swallow them? Wtf? And why did you have to go to the ER? Couldn't you have waited, and shat them out?

30days 0

Friday 10 April 2009 20:41

I totally get where you're comin from. I'm 19 and I always stick stuff thats like in my hand into my mouth. Never swallowed anything though...

lilnurse_44 0

Friday 10 April 2009 20:41

So I work in an ER. 1. people ask why he would go to the ER for something like this? the answer is because people go to the ER for stupid shit all the time. (call 911 for stubbed toes, a rash that they've had for 4 months... etc). 2. If you came into my ER b/c you swallowed magnets, i would have laughed at you too.