Health: Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

By CaoiiBieber - 17/07/2011 19:15 - Ireland

Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 255

You deserved it 38 868

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Same thing different taste

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 746

You deserved it 247

By Nick - 11/02/2010 18:35 - United States

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 496

You deserved it 5 583

By 8sq - 11/06/2011 01:32 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 602

You deserved it 16 358

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 252

You deserved it 5 504

Introvert struggles

By knife knife - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Dalkeith

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 919

You deserved it 15 488

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 603

You deserved it 56 771

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 00:01

Today, a fork hit me in the eye. I was holding it. I didn't even get to eat my chicken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 410

You deserved it 556

By lectro - 23/11/2008 08:22 - France

Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 928

You deserved it 31 037

By Anonymous - 11/07/2013 17:08 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 704

You deserved it 54 235

By Dipping Tired - 20/04/2016 23:17 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, while half asleep, I dipped my finger in ketchup instead of a fry, and bit down on it so hard I needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 753

You deserved it 7 196

JayBear14 11

Monday 18 July 2011 0:25

how does that work?

Captain_Obvious2_fml 6

Monday 18 July 2011 0:58

i had trouble clicking this...

Comments

Reddeaded 5

Monday 18 July 2011 6:56

what an "accident"

plantfood 4

Monday 18 July 2011 6:59

how does a fork just happen to slip down your throat? slow down when you eat...

kaykay9080 5

Monday 18 July 2011 7:14

'Accidentally' bitch shut the **** up, you know loved it.

redmnky21 8

Monday 18 July 2011 7:14

accidently my ass... just admit it

aerogxt 7

Monday 18 July 2011 7:26

hmmm are you free tomorrow night? ;)

izzy7 11

Monday 18 July 2011 7:28

Accidentally? How does that happen?

crowbar_2010 2

Monday 18 July 2011 7:29

harold and kumar comes to mind... kumar- "down to the tonsils!" *knee to the balls and a fart* harold- "dont you dare talk about my angel like that!"

markiesharkie 0

Monday 18 July 2011 7:29

they're called pickling cucumbers ^_^

Vaginabutter 15

Monday 18 July 2011 7:37

forkin stupid

KickItHigh 32

Monday 18 July 2011 7:42

YDI because of your username.

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I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 10

Today, I spent five hours extracting gold flakes from river sand. When I took it to the pawn shop, the dealer laughed in my face and said it was Fool's Gold. FML

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I agree, your life sucks 12 309

You deserved it 37 010

Today, I needed emergency work on my house, so I’ve been taking wine, beer, and chocolates to my neighbours as an apology for the noise and dust. Later, one of the husbands came round and punched me for showing him up, because he hasn’t given his wife chocolates in years, so she’s mad at him and he blames me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 612

You deserved it 117

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I agree, your life sucks 49 035

You deserved it 5 947

Today, I got proof that martial arts don’t really work, I’ve supposedly worked my way up to my black belt, and I challenged my brother to a match. He floored me with one punch before I could do anything, and he only weight lifts to keep in shape, he’s never done martial arts in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 1 356

Today, my boyfriend came to wake me up with some flowers and breakfast in bed. We started getting intimate, after a short while, there was a knock. We looked out of the window and there was the window cleaner with his thumbs up and grinning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 332

You deserved it 5 072

Today, I was in a quiet library, trying to stifle a sneeze. In the process, I let out an embarrassingly loud and dramatic snort that echoed through the room. Heads turned. Many stared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 544

You deserved it 168

Same thing different taste

Hangry dude

Introvert struggles

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