Holidays: Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized...

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By nolinguist - 22/11/2009 17:39 - Austria

Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 322

You deserved it 18 801

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Same thing different taste

Scheiße!

By Xerfox - 03/07/2016 18:05 - Germany - Löwenstein

Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 514

You deserved it 1 990

By traveling - 09/07/2013 11:18

Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 988

You deserved it 6 418

Back home

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 19:21 - Germany - Neunkirchen

Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 052

You deserved it 5 372

By Anonymous - 01/10/2013 07:30 - Austria - Vienna

Today, I was in an Austrian bar, making polite conversation in my broken German with a slightly odd middle-aged man. He said, winking, that he was near to his pension. I smiled and nodded, thinking he was talking about retirement. My friend later informed me that 'pension' is German for 'apartment'. Ew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 346

You deserved it 4 498

Moving on

By Awesome - 17/08/2011 00:05

Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 986

You deserved it 2 805

Listen up

By Pfnüselfüsel - 20/07/2023 18:00

Today, my German colleague complained that when I spoke German, I had a Swiss accent in it, which was "not nice to hear". Well Honey, we live in Switzerland, what accent did you expect us to have when you moved here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 118

By nullroute - 16/02/2016 11:34 - Switzerland

Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 153

You deserved it 2 814

By Jan - 27/02/2013 04:50 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 290

You deserved it 4 327

By lostforwords - 06/08/2011 19:10 - Ireland

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 088

You deserved it 6 307

By hrmpf - 19/01/2016 14:37 - Germany - Bremen

Today, I went to the hairdresser for the first time in the country I just moved to. Guess I don't speak the language as well as I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 001

You deserved it 2 966

allmidnighteyes 10

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:07

"ich liebe meine scheide" just say that everywhere you go

badbunny 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:22

remember, the universal language for ordering at a restaraunt is point at the item listed.

Comments

cooperisacat 0

Monday 23 November 2009 4:28

Ugh, stop whining, you'll pick it up in less than two weeks.

lexiedear 0

Monday 23 November 2009 5:04

This shouldn't be in a surprise. Any German teacher who is worth anything will inform you no less than twenty times a semester that each German-speaking country has it's own dialect.

menschmaschine5 0

Monday 23 November 2009 5:09

1. You'll pick up the dialect without much difficulty if you have a decent command of hochdeutsch (the German they teach in schools). 2. Until then, most people in Austria speak English, so that's always something to fall back on.

darnesey 0

Monday 23 November 2009 5:11

you'll get used to the language. it's only natural.

StJimmy117 0

Monday 23 November 2009 6:11

Have fun!

cool_kid_cone 0

Monday 23 November 2009 6:15

idiot. you should know that. If you were smart you'd at least do some research on the place you're going to if you're there for 6 months or so.

kcg4305 0

Monday 23 November 2009 6:25

good thing you will be able to pick up the dialect in 6 months. It might suck, but don't let people talk to you and you will learn a lot, you'll have to.