Holidays: Today, I attended a white elephant party at work and the box...

By Miriam - 10/12/2016 08:44

Today, I attended a white elephant party at work and the box I picked had whisky and beer. Since I am a Muslim, I took it to my Christian friend's house and gave it to him. As I was walking there, I passed my imam on the street. Awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 793

You deserved it 1 281

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By crazygirl - 15/12/2010 02:18 - Canada

Today, I went to a work party where we had a Secret Santa. I gave a nice set of beer bottles with glasses. When my name was called I naturally picked the biggest gift. I got groceries. I now have dog food and men's body spray. I don't have a boyfriend or a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 234

You deserved it 33 763

Smart move

By Triedtobecool - 06/04/2009 02:22 - Canada

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 974

You deserved it 99 955

The gift that keeps on giving!

By Anonymous - 26/12/2017 19:30 - United States - New Bremen

Today, for our Christmas gift exchange, we were supposed to all bring alcohol. I got a Crown Royal Apple box with a couple of positive pregnancy tests. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 590

You deserved it 520

By Wino - 05/12/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 787

You deserved it 34 547

Merry Christmas, I guess!

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, we did a Secret Santa at work and instead of buying cringe romance novels and candy for this other girl, I bought her a fantasy novel and a bag of dried mangos. When I went to leave for the day, I found both of my thoughtful gifts in the trash can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285

You deserved it 806

By thechimpchapter - 31/12/2011 06:48 - United States

Today, I found out that the neighbor I'd given a bottle of wine to for Christmas is a recovering alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 477

You deserved it 7 173

By hozzyandie - 14/12/2010 18:02 - Ireland

Today, at the office, everyone in my department swapped secret santa presents. I bought the guy whose name I picked a DVD box-set of his favorite TV series. One of my friends got a fancy make up kit. Another got a pack of posh notebooks. I got a toilet plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 694

You deserved it 3 344

Nice try

By Anonymous - 23/01/2022 21:00 - Philippines

Today, I got drunk until morning at a college friend's apartment with bunch of strangers. Some officials came in due to the noise and I tried to scare them away by pretending to sing a latin song of worship I made up, thinking they'd respect the gathering if it was a religious one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 458

Thanks

By Lonely Heathen - 23/11/2023 22:30 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my coworkers had a Thanksgiving party, but it was Christians only, so I wasn't invited. I'm an expat, and I don't know any other Americans here. I was lonely, so I invited a non-American friend out to dinner. She said she couldn't go because she was invited to a Thanksgiving party. I spent the evening alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 587

You deserved it 161

By Michigan - 05/02/2009 01:18 - United States

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 743

You deserved it 4 874

LikesRedLollis 19

Sunday 11 December 2016 1:32

Well, I mean, if they ask you, you could always explain. I'm sure they wouldn't mind.

whatshuman43 8

Sunday 11 December 2016 1:46

Well the point of a white elephant gift is to be useless and hard to get rid of, so whoever bought that had much more success than they intended

Comments

Isa_fml 20

Sunday 11 December 2016 9:44

I'm sure if you explain they'll understand. :)

gahro_nahvah 10

Sunday 11 December 2016 12:12

Well your Christian friend would just have to find a way to get rid of it also. The generally accepted "limit" of alcohol is the point at which there's intoxication that's noticeable, as being drunk is listed as something wrong.

IHaveThePower 16

Monday 18 September 2023 3:26

Most Christians 'get rid of' alcohol by savoring it over a few years, though. For the majority of Muslims, alcohol (and pork and a bunch of other stuff) is on the Do Not Eat At All list--some of it based on Ye Olde Timey Health And Safety Regulationes stuff, some of it based on Goddamnit Steve If You Get Drunk One More Time stuff. (Anthropologically speaking, that is--a lot of these rules have different cultural versus religious bases. The cultural reasons are often very much rooted in either disease prevention, or That One Guy.)

Wormgod 10

Sunday 11 December 2016 14:41

Crap dude. Make sure to explain!

r1has 28

Sunday 11 December 2016 18:36

Cept ya can't re gift or sell alcohol as a Muslim. I can understand you not knowing that, because it isn't a very talked about Hadith, since most people, scholars included, tend to stop the alcohol discussion at don't drink it. I only know this because I read the entire Saheeh Bukhari once. Since I'm presuming you didn't know this before, your past actions don't matter, but just for future reference, if you get alcohol as a gift, you're supposed to throw it away

MrrMan 15

Sunday 11 December 2016 21:31

That is correct ????

emokitty91 12

Monday 12 December 2016 10:24

sounds like a waste but for that matter if they're not supposed to be in possession of it from what I remember can't you swap or exchange the gifts in a white elephant? i feel like this person could have done that..