Health: Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God...

By lolzor - 12/03/2009 12:07 - Australia

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 490

You deserved it 106 083

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Same thing different taste

By wintersoldier - 14/07/2015 02:36 - Austria

Today, while trying to comfort my little brother who just injured his leg, I tripped and sprained my ankle. At least he was amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 056

You deserved it 2 378

By Dude_Stop - 27/03/2017 18:00

Today, I was hanging out with my friends when I tripped and a chair rolled over my foot, breaking a bone. A friend, who didn't believe me, then dogpiled on top of me and laughed as I screamed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 255

You deserved it 330

Man of faith

By ??? - 29/11/2009 07:59 - United States

Today, while I was in confession telling my sins to the priest, he called me a "pain in the ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 629

You deserved it 9 925

By seussical65 - 14/04/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 739

You deserved it 93 544

By fucking har har, dad - 05/10/2012 23:38 - Australia

Today, two days after leaving hospital with a broken left leg, I tripped and fell heavily on the floor. My dad quickly asked if I'd broken my other leg. When I reassured him that I hadn't, he disappointedly muttered that it would've been a hilarious story to tell his friends at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 569

You deserved it 2 376

By Atheist - 22/03/2012 04:56 - United States - Portland

Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 604

You deserved it 5 627

By Slipperywhenwet - 20/01/2017 10:00

Today, I tripped over a "Caution: Slippery When Wet" floor sign and sprained my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 508

You deserved it 2 005

By william - 22/01/2009 23:22 - United States

Today, I made fun of my friend when she tripped over the curb. I said, loudly, "Haha, you can't even walk." I then notice the man in the wheelchair a few feet ahead of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 916

You deserved it 32 433

Grave error

By spyrogers1677 - 18/11/2022 00:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my job as a funeral director, I fell ass over heels into the grave in front of a hundred mourners and an unamused Catholic priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 153

By Ashley - 07/10/2013 06:11 - United States - Belmont

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 281

You deserved it 8 083

alex_vik 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 20:02

You deserved that for calling a priest lame.

HopelesslyHpfl 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 20:03

you don't mess with God's followers Haha

Comments

zimandme123 0

Friday 10 June 2011 6:08

holy crap.... this stuff scares the SHIT out of me......

fuuuubissh 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 7:40

karma's a bitch ain't it?

MwahFMLS 6

Saturday 30 July 2011 4:50

Well deserved. :)

annabanana547 0

Monday 1 August 2011 8:20

God always gets his way.;)

czalc 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:44

Hmm...coincidence?

Red_Wing_Nut44 14

Tuesday 13 September 2011 3:46

Well God has smitten you.

Red_Wing_Nut44 14

Sunday 25 September 2011 7:51

Get ******.

garfield224 0

Sunday 9 October 2011 0:07

Both sides of this conflict should get over themselves. No proof. No disproof. Shut the he'll up already

newmandotcom 6

Saturday 3 December 2011 13:40

Consider yourself smote....

Philerup31 12

Saturday 10 December 2011 4:57

Karma must be a close friend of the lord ain't she?

Keywords

Party Awkward Lonely Love Transportation Cars ADHD Mental health Work Ironic Vacation Grandparents Accident Miscellaneous Kids Annoying Covid Health Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Art Photography Videos Sex Intimacy Exhausted Scams

The Top

Today, I found out my husband is a cuck. After explaining that I'm not exactly satisfied in the bedroom, we were thinking of ideas to spice things up. I suggested buying a few toys he could use on me. He immediately got mad, because he wanted me to find other men to screw instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 217

You deserved it 73

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 374

You deserved it 1 986

The Top

Today, my partner refuses to get rid of an automatic air-freshener that goes off with a decent noise in our bathroom. I have PTSD and it startles me EVERY time it goes off, even when I try to prepare. At least it’s in an area where I can get the shit scared out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 178

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 3 075

Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 158

You deserved it 95 493

Today, because the policy "no shirt, no shoes, no service" doesn't mention pants, my friends got the hilarious idea to walk into a store with no pants on. I tried to be reasonable and say they would get arrested, but they called me a "chicken" and did it anyway. Take a wild guess what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 210

Today, I went to a crowded Walmart with the hot new girl I'm dating. It was raining and we had to park far from the entrance. As soon as we got out of my car, she started sprinting to get out of the rain. I ran to catch up and slipped on a metal plate, and did a reverse Superman onto my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 076

You deserved it 5 568

Today, I bought a used car from a friend of mine. After getting the car home and further inspecting it, I found one of my wife's earrings in the backseat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 518

You deserved it 4 573

Same thing different taste

Man of faith

Grave error

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