Work: Today, I decided to come out to a co-worker. She looked at me,... - FML

By BearMan - 09/02/2009 22:00 - United States

Today, I decided to come out to a co-worker. She looked at me, then laughed, and said, "You can't be gay, you're fat!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 073

You deserved it 4 876

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Same thing different taste

The straights are at it again

By Anonymous - 17/06/2023 12:00

Today, I came out to my parents. My mother laughed and, when I asked her what was so funny, she told me, "Well, most gays are attractive, muscular, funny and can dress very well. You're ugly, fat, boring, and have no sense of fashion. Good luck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 287

By Anonymous - 23/12/2016 00:22

Today, a coworker told me I was "fat shaming" them by discussing weight loss with other coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 609

You deserved it 733

Mixed signals

By Mark - 27/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Knoxville

Today, I asked out a coworker I really like. She gave me a weird look and said, "You're not gay?" I said no, to which she said, "Well, I am". As it turns out, I was the only one who thought she was straight, and the only one who thought I was straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 830

You deserved it 379

By Chubby - 17/11/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 216

You deserved it 5 182

Ah yes, homophobic jokes, so funny

By Anonymous - 05/02/2021 05:01

Today, I was working at my desk when a colleague came over to my desk and said, “You loiter in gay bars”. I started having a panic attack because I thought he'd found out and would out me to my wife. Only when he began cracking up laughing did I realise it was a "joke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 2 102

Yeah, that probably wouldn't work

By Anonymous - 20/03/2020 03:30

Today, a coworker was telling me he was lonely and needed someone special in his life. I replied, "Why don't you find yourself a girlfriend?" He looked at me weird and said, "I'm gay." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 477

You deserved it 522

By bad boss - 03/04/2018 01:30

Today, I had to reprimand an employee for her bad attitude and terrible work performance. She went to HR and said I harassed her for being gay. Guess who they believed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 879

You deserved it 283

By fatty - 07/06/2009 02:14 - United States

Today, my friend was complaining about how fat she was. To make her feel better I said, "Psh, you're not fat! In fact we're about the same weight!" She looked at me for a second, then burst into tears sobbing, "I'm fat! I'm fat!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 722

You deserved it 10 588

Being nice is so 1968

By Anonymous - 23/06/2017 01:00 - Saudi Arabia

Today, I decided to do something nice and compliment a stranger. I told a girl that I liked her skirt and that it looked good on her. She just rolled her eyes at me and said, "I'm not gay". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 324

You deserved it 549

By augiedd - 05/03/2014 02:46 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 831

You deserved it 7 460

Next

Top comments

beililee 0

Tuesday 10 February 2009 1:27

omg. that's horrible. I hope you responded with "and you can't be straight. you're skinny." (if she was a skinny bitch that is)

itsucktobeme 0

Friday 13 February 2009 4:23

That is so terrible... I hope that you said something to that mean bitch. But on another note Good for you for coming out!!!!

Comments

mysticold13 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 17:37

That co-worker must be reeeeaaally sheltered... she must get her image of gay people from the television. Tell her to come up here to Boystown in Chicago and tell all the big gay guys down on Halstead that they must be secretly straight because they're fat and see how quickly she gets bitch-slapped.

illneverbehappy 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 18:17

HAHAHAH she's so dumb

ilovefatcats 12

Tuesday 6 April 2010 2:20

go show that bitchwhos gay, bearman!!

bossybanks 0

Thursday 22 April 2010 5:10

gay pride!!!!!!!!!

gay1 0

Wednesday 17 November 2010 15:21

woot woot!! GAY PRIDE!!

YakuzaxGeneralz 9

Monday 7 June 2010 8:29

rotflmfgaoddalsjd

rzbt21 0

Saturday 14 August 2010 0:25

ydi for being a fat ****

Britney_Spears 1

Monday 13 December 2010 19:26

I don't mean to be rude, or threatening, but you deserve to live in poverty for 400 years, AND... I will cut you.

tantrum4pres 0

Friday 12 November 2010 7:51

you homosexuals are garbage

HemptressMedea 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 22:10

You should've said " aww! and you're too ugly for me to care what you think!"

swimmer911 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 5:40

no. you need to find yourself some help. what you're doing is wrong.

zco101 1

Friday 15 July 2011 6:23

excuse me but the gay guy from modern family is pretty chubby. and on of the best characters too

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The Top

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 540

You deserved it 1 905

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves, so I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview, I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202 679

You deserved it 52 051

The Top

Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 460

You deserved it 3 593

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 391

You deserved it 6 349

Today, I was sitting next to this cute guy on an airplane who I had started talking to. There was still an empty seat between us and it seemed like there weren't any more passengers boarding the plane. I then asked out loud, "I wonder if anyone will sit between us?" He replied "I hope so." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 236

You deserved it 12 541

Today, I was offered a "rust and accident free“ used car at the dealership. By chance, I managed to track down the previous owner, who was quite surprised I was asking about it, saying, "That one was totaled, I thought it had been scrapped!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 73

Today, I came home to my wife packing a bag. We had been fighting recently and I understood why she was leaving, but then I noticed she wasn't packing her stuff. She explained that I was the one who was leaving, she was just packing my bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 686

You deserved it 2 274

Today, the ex I still have feelings for made a post on Facebook announcing her two month anniversary with her boyfriend. She broke up with me less than two weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 927

You deserved it 3 122