Animals: Today, I discovered why my pet bird has been hiding behind my...

By thisisnotavirustrustme.exe - 18/04/2015 19:34 - United States - New City

Today, I discovered why my pet bird has been hiding behind my couch pillow lately. It's not because she was nesting, as I thought. She's been secretly tearing apart the whole couch from behind there instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 419

You deserved it 4 721

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Same thing different taste

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 02/03/2013 00:54 - United States

Today, I noticed my dog chewing on something while on the couch. It looked like a wash rag of some sort, so I grabbed it from my dog. It wasn't until after I picked it up that I noticed it wasn't a wash rag. It was a small, dead bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 784

You deserved it 3 127

Smooth criminal

By Anonymous - 26/04/2023 10:00

Today, I found out that my cat has been secretly stealing my socks and hiding them under the couch, when I found a pile of 15 socks after I finally moved my furniture to vacuum the floor underneath. FML

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You deserved it 180

By Dog Person Now - 31/05/2018 01:30

Today, I came home to find that my sweet kitten had gotten out and dragged a bird inside, where he ripped it to shreds. I found the bird's head in my underwear drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 779

You deserved it 506

Freedom!

By Anonymous - 27/08/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was showing off my new pet bird to my friends over video chat. I opened the cage to demonstrate how friendly he was. Instead of perching on my finger like usual, he flew out the window. I spent the next hour chasing him around the neighborhood in my pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 514

By Mr.P - 21/10/2011 15:35 - United States

Today, I was just about to sit down to watch my favorite TV show when my dog jumped over the back of my couch, landed on my head and tried to jump through the window. I now have concussion and a window to replace, all because of a bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 225

You deserved it 3 268

Late reaction

By "chris_lillo" - 31/01/2020 18:00 - United States - Waco

Today I bought a new cage, along with some toys, for my bird. I came home to find my bird had escaped its old cage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 804

You deserved it 214

Bad doggo!

By Vicky - 22/09/2024 14:00 - Australia

Today, I came home to find that my dog had destroyed my couch. The worst part? He buried his plastic toy bone inside the wreckage, so he clearly thinks this is his new personal sandbox play pit spot. I'm afraid to get a new couch and put it in the same place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 139

By Zannanana - 30/10/2018 05:00

Today, I realised my parrot loves to masturbate on anything soft I own, like my sweater, house socks, blanket, and even my hair bun on the top of my head. I only realised this when my boyfriend pointed out that my parrot was humping my bun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 742

You deserved it 337

By Anonymous - 20/06/2013 16:54 - Pakistan - Lahore

Today, I discovered the source of the vile stench in my room. My daughter had "saved" a bird from our cat and put it in a box under my bed, hoping to nurse it back to health. She forgot about it, leaving the corpse rotting in there for who knows how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 734

You deserved it 3 443

By KHAAAAA-RMA!! - 10/05/2014 21:32 - United States

Today, I found a bird that had fallen from its nest, so I made a new nest for it in a shoebox and put it as close to the old one as possible. When I checked back on it later, all I found was a chewed-up corpse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 842

You deserved it 6 191

Welshite 39

Sunday 19 April 2015 12:41

Polly wants some cotton. She could also be looking for loose change to hire the cute pigeon from outside the window.

Cads1 24

Sunday 19 April 2015 12:44

Sounds like the bird may become dinner soon.

Comments

buckdharma 37

Sunday 19 April 2015 14:13

A partridge in a bare settee?

Cads1 24

Sunday 19 April 2015 14:44

Shit house, just a plain shit house pun. But I will give it a thumb up anyway.

limegreenpoopie 31

Sunday 19 April 2015 15:27

Awww polly wanna cotton :3

abNormal62 23

Sunday 19 April 2015 16:29

The nesting instinct is strong in all females You can't do an adequate job without comparing swatches in the intended light

Sparx1_1 16

Sunday 19 April 2015 19:04

Ummm OP that's exactly what birds do when they nest. The easier it is to rip up the bigger/deeper the nest will be.

inolongercare 19

Sunday 19 April 2015 19:13

Why have you not been checking what your boss was doing for that long?!

johnny17 16

Sunday 19 April 2015 19:23

Plot twist: she's making a nest behind the couch pillow

jcfrisco 13

Sunday 19 April 2015 22:29

ydi.jpg

nathanschmitz3 2

Sunday 19 April 2015 23:02

That's weird. Never thought parrots would do that kind of stuff, thought that was more of a dog thing.

ribx 16

Tuesday 21 April 2015 14:08

My lorikeet has an outdoor aviary, she sometimes digs huge holes, like three times the size of her body, with her tiny beak. Still don't know why she does it, considering she's single and I'm pretty sure they nest in trees. It's not to escape either because she doesn't aim for the edge

yellowzinnias 20

Monday 20 April 2015 0:02

She could, actually, still be nesting. She would feel safer within the sofa, so once she has a hole she might have started building the nest in it. If you think she's preparing to lay, make sure you have an enclosed space for her to nest, since it seems she prefers that.