Health: Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled...

By Anonymous - 02/10/2012 19:39 - United States - Richland

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 723

You deserved it 2 957

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/09/2013 16:38 - Switzerland - Bern

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 007

You deserved it 3 594

By Pottymouth - 25/07/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 034

You deserved it 24 547

By phoneless - 17/04/2012 19:23 - Jordan

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 172

You deserved it 26 233

By breakinphones - 20/02/2011 02:03 - United States

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 638

You deserved it 81 724

Smooth.

By yosmurf - 13/08/2018 23:31

Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 127

You deserved it 1 216

By Kris - 06/12/2010 20:31 - United States

Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 156

You deserved it 29 179

By Anonymous - 05/08/2009 11:04 - India

Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 837

You deserved it 5 780

By ryanharp2 - 27/07/2012 05:05 - United States - Conway

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 712

You deserved it 42 993

By Paige - 26/12/2011 06:35 - United States

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 203

You deserved it 52 261

By thesadone - 03/07/2010 06:49 - United States

Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 967

You deserved it 10 764

Psych101 9

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:00

"I fell on it?"

LlamaUprising 10

Tuesday 2 October 2012 23:58

Classy.

Comments

steven84_fml 4

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:15

Any missed calls?

TurtleSmile 14

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:16

Must have got some pretty crappy reception.

_krystallynn_ 11

Wednesday 3 October 2012 3:36

punny lol

Token780 3

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:17

Is there an App for that?

BntyHntrSeattle 30

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:21

You should email Apple about what happened; they're always striving for innovation with their devices.

Eternal94 10

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:23

This remain me of an old FLM about the iPhone in someone daughter ******

JAB2010 1

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:25

Reminds me of that x-ray I found online of a dude with a potato AND jelly jar stuck up there. I just don't get the fascination with that orifice.

kikimonole 13

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:27

Well that's a shitty situation. Pardon the bad pun. Sorry, OP. Some people just have this weird obsession with things going up their bungholio.

FightingCanuck 2

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:29

It's literally "the shit"

mrbobmarley4 8

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:30

Was I the only one that thought Doc Bastard wrote this?

White_like_dat 3

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:31

Still better than a Samsung Galaxy S3....

Keywords

Thanksgiving Politics Holidays Miscellaneous Family Transportation AITA Am I overreacting? Cars Cheating Suspicious Contraception Love Pregnancy Scary Christmas Sex Awkward Weddings Singing Embarrassing My ex Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Relatable Mental health Therapy Argument

The Top

Today, I told my roommate that I was an atheist and she laughed. I left and returned to find her and her prayer group praying for my soul. She told me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I said no. Then she told me to find somewhere else to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 855

You deserved it 1 042

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 245

You deserved it 4 766

The Top

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 401

You deserved it 54 306

Today, my husband got drunk, which was bad enough, but then he got me to the point where I wanted sex too, so I let him climb aboard. He was inside me for 3 thrusts and then stopped. He’d fallen asleep, so I pushed him off me, mad as hell, then he farted and shit a little bit. I married this twat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 937

You deserved it 775

Today, I was visiting my grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 and after about 30 minutes I explained to her that, "I'm going to have to leave, it's just too hot in here." She replied, "You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell." I laughed. She didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 571

You deserved it 6 342

Today, it was mine and my fiancé's 4 year anniversary. What did he get me? Nothing, but I did find out he's been cheating on me with multiple women. Guess I’m back to 0 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 115

You deserved it 171

Today, I travelled by myself for the first time. I was seated next to a middle-aged man who was trying to convince me that I was his soulmate, kept touching my face and sniffing me. I'm 19 and it was a 6 hour flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 272

You deserved it 93

Today, we went to the mall and my husband picked me out some perfume. When I asked him why he liked that particular one he responded with, "that's what's the stripper at my bachelor party was wearing." He was completely serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 775

You deserved it 4 239

Same thing different taste

Smooth.

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