Wait until you have your first child, then you will understand. It's a good thing she wrote it down. There are those woman who have acted out their feelings and your mom wasn't one of them. Be grateful that you are alive.

Have you ever been around an infant 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? I'm glad that I haven't - dealing with them for a couple of hours at a time is hard enough. I'm always a little bit surprised that there aren't more overwhelmed mothers killing themselves, or hurting their children, than there already are.

The point is she didn't, that's love.

You blatantly violated your mother's privacy, and are now complaining because, through your own disrespectful act, you found out something you should have never known? A diary is supposed to be a highly personal space for expressing emotions, not a PR stunt intended for the whole world to see. I guarantee that if you kept a diary and were honest to it, it would contain plenty of your "skeletons in the closet". Like it or not, it's entirely normal for parents to feel frustrated about their children. I highly doubt your mother would have actually hurt you; the diary was just her way of venting her emotions.

I'm sure glad you're able to construct a paragraph...

Keep in mind parenting and infant is extremely stressful because the child can't do anything for itself. Your mom also might have had some sort of depression caused by having you, and just never got help for it, or didn't know she had it. My mom told me when I was 1 week old she was so stressed that she would fantasize about giving me up for adoption. Now she loves me with all her heart. Don't sweat it OP, she loves you now:)

Curiosity killed the cat. Thankfully for you, your mother didn't do the same.

You all have cancer

But she DIDN'T. That's what matters.

PND can be an unholy bitch. Be glad she got through it.