GET A LAWYER!!!! (laws vary per state). Make sure there is a DNA test. Do everything you can to MINIMIZE your verifiable income (if you work a regular income job with W-2's you're screwed); and try to MAXIMIZE your verifiable legitimate living expenses (some states let you deduct this from your income to compute allowable deductions for child support). Also - decide what kind of visitation you want - how involved do you want to be? This is also often taken into consideration when calculating child support. In fact, in some states, YOU CAN SUE FOR JOINT CUSTODY, 50/50 custody means, NO CHILD SUPPORT. Or, if she's mentally unstable, and a screw up, and an unfit parent, sue for SOLE CUSTODY - - she pays YOU Child Support (a male friend of mine did this - and WON; because his gf had been institutionalized 3 times for suicidal depression. . . no, srsly, she was fcking crazy). If you just want to have as little to do as possible; get your lawyer together, and see what you can do about creating a minimal income profile. Maybe take a leave of absence from your job if you have a high-paying job. If she's in a different state, and if she's on welfare, or also very poor, it will be almost impossible for her to check-up on you. (block her, and everyone she knows on FB). Make it look like you are a busboy, and you earn minimum wage, and that's all you get. The judge will give her like $150/month. After the court decision is set, go back to your old job. Unfortunately - they're probably going to try to sue for back-support, which will mean they'll want like the last 8 years of W-2's which means they'll want a % cut of that (like 25%) (I know, FYL) even if you are now unemployed and homeless. Yes, if you have a penis in this world, you are the devil. This is why: #1 - get that DNA test! if it's negative, txt her a picture of you flipping her the bird and calling her a lazy greedy ****.

@98 - you're an a**hole. I agree, get a DNA test. If you're the dad, you will have to pay child support, but you'll have rights as well, assuming that you would like to meet & get to know your child. I do agree that retro-active child support is BS, when the guy never knew he had a kid. Maybe you could fight that, based on the fact that you didn't have any knowledge of, or rights to meet/see the kid? Regarding the woman - she should have told the ex, totally awful to not let the guy know about the kid. (assuming she's on the level). Worse to contact him now, and insist that she only wants money from him. However, what do we know about the dad? Maybe they had an abusive relationship? Maybe some very ugly things were said/done? Maybe she truly felt that having him out of the kid's life was the best solution, and the only reason she's contacting him now is because of economic necessity. (Lost her job, or in this case support of boyfriend....if she applied for state assistance, I believe they automatically pursue child support on your behalf before they'll help anyone.)

Ha, ha! YDI for having a Facebook account

Stop using your facebook account so she thinks you haven't been on @_@!! ..or well at least first have the kid's DNA checked out, don't pay till you know for sure. But I'm sure it's possible to fight it as well, you weren't told she was pregnant, you weren't able to see the kid when he was born, when he was a baby or while growing up then she comes out of the blue simply for money? Regardless of if that sounds bad or not, she's the asshole.

I agree with the others. DNA test first, and then if the kid is yours and you need to pay child support, make sure that you get visitation. If you pay, you should get to see your kid.

by law her bf has to pay the child support cause he supported the kid from birth one of my friends got into a situation likr that turns out wasn't his kid anyway. but u should get a DNA test and some kind of custody do u can atleast see what if paying for

yep. DNA required.

child support? that's the worst STD out there! dayum, fyl.

get a dna test. if its yours offer to pay support if you get visitation. sucks that she didn't tell you till now, but your fault (and hers, it takes 2) for knocking her up.

Damn due good luck with that. all I have left to say is run bitch run