Intimacy: Today, I found out that if my son and daughter in law are mad...

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 23:24 - United States

Today, I found out that if my son and daughter in law are mad at me, they do it on my furniture. So far, they've done it on the table, my bed, and all the living room couches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 617

You deserved it 13 190

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Same thing different taste

By kewtness_17 - 01/10/2011 23:10 - United States

Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 557

You deserved it 12 176

By Anonymous - 21/05/2019 14:11

Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 783

You deserved it 198

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 464

You deserved it 5 680

Thanks, Mom

By The Towel Molester - 26/01/2012 14:49 - Australia

Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity." I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 458

You deserved it 3 311

Freeze peach

By Anonymous - 31/01/2023 22:30

Today, my kids decided to draw on the walls with permanent marker, and now my house looks like a modern art exhibit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 274

Meddling

By Anonymous - 22/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I found out my mom has been randomly searching my room. I've asked her repeatedly to stop, but she says it's her right as a parent. In retaliation I started searching their room when they were out, and found porn mags and DVDs. I confronted mom about it. Long story short, dad's in a hotel. What have I done?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 652

Parenting fail

By Anonymous - 21/01/2020 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I left the living room for 3 minutes to make a coffee. When I went back, my 4-year old had found a permanent marker, God knows where, since I don't own a permanent marker. She'd then drawn on her face, the carpet, wall, sofa, both dogs and as an added bonus the TV screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 985

You deserved it 549

By Anonymous - 15/10/2011 01:48 - Canada

Today, I came home from school to find almost every single personal possession and piece of furniture from my bedroom all laid out or disassembled in the back yard. My dad smugly told me I'd better start moving it all back. This is his revenge for me salting his coffee this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 177

You deserved it 41 142

Call the police!

By ChangingTheLocks - 13/07/2019 12:30

Today, I came home after a long day at work to find the furniture in my living room had been rearranged by my mother-in-law. When asked how she got in, she told us she stole my husband's key and made herself a copy. She can now come here whenever she wants, unless I change the locks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 210

You deserved it 160

Inappropriate, honey

By Jessica - 15/05/2009 00:03 - United States

Today, my 6 year-old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop "pretending to be daddy" against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 111

You deserved it 47 708

TheOthin 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 9:53

I can't be the only one who missed the "in law" bit at first.

Jessi_the_sexii 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 9:23

maybe you should do it in THEIR bed

Comments

Dcm210 19

Friday 23 September 2011 2:06

then don't piss them off.

princess151617 4

Tuesday 15 November 2011 12:22

Lmfao...that's awesome...!

TipsyHobo 7

Sunday 18 December 2011 3:59

Idk how to take this... are we talking incest or orgy?

HiveMindFury 15

Monday 19 December 2011 22:54

Glad to see I'm not the only one who missed "in law" first time reading it XD

BlackCloudedSldr 5

Wednesday 18 January 2012 8:24

To those who think this is incest... FY little pathetic L. That is all.

CloudAuron1 1

Monday 12 November 2012 19:35

Maybe you need to stop making them mad, just saying

shadwolf99 2

Tuesday 17 September 2013 12:59

Disown them. Incest is not ok.

sc3ptical 30

Wednesday 6 November 2013 0:25

How is that incest? Her SON is related to her, while her DAUGHTER IN LAW is her son's wife -.- Either way, OP, FYL.

_Nagini_ 4

Tuesday 10 December 2013 2:58

Wait. Sex or waste deposit?

Rammer3500 23

Sunday 7 December 2014 5:36

Incest much? Can I say nasty?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to get gas for my car. While waiting in line at the cash register, I was next person, and I noticed the cashier had her name tag on her boob. I like to know other people’s names, and the name tag said Irene. The cashier saw me looking at her breast so now I'm not sure if she thinks I’m a pervert or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 170

Today, my crazy mother-in-law threatened to camp out outside my house so she will "never get left out" of our lives, all because we called instead of sending a written invitation to my three-year-old's birthday party. I actually believe she's crazy enough to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 160

You deserved it 1 868

The Top

Today, I found out the guy I was talking and mutually flirty with is married. I was under the impression that he was divorced, up until when he told me that he's married and assumed that I knew. He says he's in a loveless marriage because his wife cheated and they're staying together for their little kid. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 824

You deserved it 158

Today, the girl who I was in love with for almost seven years listed me on facebook as her "Brother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 030

You deserved it 6 465

Today, I drove for 45 minutes to find an open print shop to scan and email my signed severance agreement for the job I'd worked at for two years, so I can keep the maximum value of the severance. They specifically asked me to scan a copy, instead of mailing. Now they've blocked my email, so I can't get my severance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 829

You deserved it 107

Today, I bought my boyfriend two concert tickets for his birthday to see our favorite band, and he told me he doesn't feel he loves me. FML

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You deserved it 97

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 338

You deserved it 5 319

Today, my family is supposed to be enjoying a day with my in-laws. The drawback? I have to spend time with my stepmom-in-law who is a conspiracy theorist, and my stepsister-in-law who has an unvaccinated 3 year-old who’s been sick a lot lately and looks like death. I have a 4 year-old and a newborn. FML

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You deserved it 312