Intimacy: Today, I found out that instead of going on a date with a girl...

By foreveravirgin - 15/08/2012 19:07 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I found out that instead of going on a date with a girl I've liked for months, I'm going to be forced to have lunch with my grandmother tomorrow. Instead of losing my virginity, I will get to be interrogated about why I'm single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 7 311

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Same thing different taste

By Forever alone Guy - 19/02/2013 23:07 - Australia - Narre Warren

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 135

You deserved it 3 824

By Anonymous - 08/01/2014 04:21 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 261

You deserved it 35 005

Mammy's boy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 22:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 167

By ghost? - 16/12/2012 08:31 - Australia - Perth

Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't spend the day with me as he had his grandmother's funeral. Lonely, I went shopping and I bumped into his mum having lunch with his 'dead' grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 557

You deserved it 2 945

By Sara - 03/05/2016 16:52 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend and I went to visit his grandparents. Everything went well, until his grandmother approached me and asked me if I wanted to try some of her old bras. I didn't want to be rude, so I went with her. Most awkward moment of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 677

You deserved it 2 117

By cheese123 - 03/01/2012 05:25 - United States

Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old granddaughter "who has never been kissed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 3 216

The gays

By kolgate - 15/02/2012 10:12 - United States

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 694

You deserved it 3 166

By fd_uplife - 05/07/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 446

You deserved it 4 242

Run for the hills

By fuck this shiit! - 15/06/2022 02:00

Today, I found out why my fiancé waited for me to meet his family. We had dinner at their place, the women were not permitted to talk while the men were in the room, also no eye contact with the men, and we had to eat separately. He says he wants me to learn to be a good and decent wife from them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 090

You deserved it 247

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 421

You deserved it 2 688

Ilikeurfmls 13

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:03

Why do you assume she would have sex with you?

doctorhook86 24

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:13

This FML smells like it was written by someone under age 20...

Comments

troublingsmile 1

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:09

No wonder you're a single virgin. You don't have the balls to say "sorry grandma, I've got a date."

saintsrocksocks 10

Thursday 16 August 2012 3:29

I've heard it's not a problem to be single and virgin. I guess I was wrong...

Briiyahh 7

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:09

Ditch her?

BunchieRules 31

Thursday 16 August 2012 2:57

The grandma or the crush?

Welshite 39

Thursday 16 August 2012 3:06

The grandmother of course. Haven't you ever heard of ditching a grandma? You take your grandma, find the deepest ditch, and pitch her in. Ditching a Grandma. I heard it's all the rage these days; right up there with cow tipping.

AznSamoan52 10

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:10

You should spend your time with your grandmother while you still can. Who knows, she could have passed away if you chose to go on a date with your girl.

NashyzzleTheN 10

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:13

Tell her you'll get lunch with her tomorrow!

klovely22 13

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:16

If the girl you like is willing to have sex with you on the first date, then she isn't worth it. You are better off having lunch with grandma.

ImmaB3AST 7

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:16

You're not the smartest tool in the shed, are ya? You have plenty of options to get the apparent guarantee of sex the same day.

andiewithlove 21

Thursday 16 August 2012 2:53

Emphasis on "tool".

sweetmama88 6

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:18

Tell granny your very busy getting ready for school , and make the date for another day! And go out and get your grove on .

birdfreak 24

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:20

Reschedule, can't be too hard

sougstad 7

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:22

You will be forever a virgin if you believe you will be forever a virgin. Stop being a puss and go out and meet another girl!

007type 26

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:24

If you are single, OP? Are you planning on loosing your virginity on first date? Kids there days...

klovely22 13

Thursday 16 August 2012 8:16

Try it this way, "If you are single, OP, do you plan on losing your virginity on the first date? Kids these days." Now doesn't that look/sound better?