Valentine's slay, Looking good and Miscellaneous: The gays

The gays

By kolgate - 15/02/2012 10:12 - United States

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 694

You deserved it 3 166

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Same thing different taste

The last to know

By RP Havens - 10/01/2013 06:25 - United States - Galloway

Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 353

You deserved it 12 341

You can't hurry love

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandma wasn't feeling well, so I went to her house to check on her. After about 20 minutes, I knew she was feeling better when she looked at me and said, "So, do you have a boyfriend yet? I pray every night that I get to live long enough to see you with a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 334

You deserved it 4 063

By leonuniz - 19/04/2015 16:34 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 539

You deserved it 5 124

Loveless

By loveless - 18/02/2010 05:07 - United States

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 893

You deserved it 4 610

By Forever alone Guy - 19/02/2013 23:07 - Australia - Narre Warren

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 135

You deserved it 3 824

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 215

You deserved it 8 144

By Anonymous - 09/02/2016 11:28 - United States - Lansing

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a romantic dinner, since we can't see each other this Valentine's Day. Halfway through, my aunt called, telling me my grandma had died. I had to leave because I was crying so much, leaving my girlfriend with a very pricey bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 995

You deserved it 4 460

Love is love

By Anonymous - 30/06/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 127

By carebear1228 - 01/07/2014 17:31 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 036

You deserved it 4 783

Mystery

By Sarraahh - 19/04/2020 05:00 - Canada

Today, my 65-year-old grandmother called and asked me to tell my boyfriend that she was flattered, but she's happily married. I have no idea what she was talking about and my boyfriend refuses to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 048

You deserved it 186

Imdead 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:20

Nice, I know how you feel. I'm 22 and single, so my grandmother is certain that I'm gay. I think it's kind of funny actually.

chloelovestoswim 6

Saturday 17 April 2010 4:14

yea but guys and he's a guy so it still implies gay

Comments

Amkii 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:35

lol What!? Maybe she said "Well, maybe all the (other) guys went on vacation!"?

chloelovestoswim 6

Saturday 17 April 2010 4:14

yea but guys and he's a guy so it still implies gay

suyci 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:58

that still wouldnt have to do anything with valentine #1

Amkii 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 13:56

#2, it could have something to do with Valentine's Day. Like, if everyone else went on vacation, that would explain why the submitter didn't have a date.

Imdead 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:20

Nice, I know how you feel. I'm 22 and single, so my grandmother is certain that I'm gay. I think it's kind of funny actually.

ZING_MASTER 0

Monday 16 February 2009 0:06

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Seegtease 0

Monday 16 February 2009 0:09

Ah, gotta love the generation that got married at 14 and any later is proof of gayness!

grooverahul 0

Tuesday 17 February 2009 1:14

haha grand moms still have a sense of humor!

Mannerheim 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 1:06

Dude, number nine is the number one funniest guy on this site. There is something about ******* your grandmother that just makes me squeal with giddy laughter. And another thing, my parents think I'm gay, but what they don't know is I only don't show them the girls I date, cause none of them have ever been white AND attractive at the same time!