Intimacy: Today, I found out that instead of going on a date with a girl...

By foreveravirgin - 15/08/2012 19:07 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I found out that instead of going on a date with a girl I've liked for months, I'm going to be forced to have lunch with my grandmother tomorrow. Instead of losing my virginity, I will get to be interrogated about why I'm single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 7 311

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Forever alone Guy - 19/02/2013 23:07 - Australia - Narre Warren

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 135

You deserved it 3 824

By Anonymous - 08/01/2014 04:21 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 261

You deserved it 35 005

Mammy's boy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 22:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 167

By ghost? - 16/12/2012 08:31 - Australia - Perth

Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't spend the day with me as he had his grandmother's funeral. Lonely, I went shopping and I bumped into his mum having lunch with his 'dead' grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 557

You deserved it 2 945

By Sara - 03/05/2016 16:52 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend and I went to visit his grandparents. Everything went well, until his grandmother approached me and asked me if I wanted to try some of her old bras. I didn't want to be rude, so I went with her. Most awkward moment of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 677

You deserved it 2 117

By cheese123 - 03/01/2012 05:25 - United States

Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old granddaughter "who has never been kissed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 3 216

The gays

By kolgate - 15/02/2012 10:12 - United States

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 694

You deserved it 3 166

By fd_uplife - 05/07/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 446

You deserved it 4 242

Run for the hills

By fuck this shiit! - 15/06/2022 02:00

Today, I found out why my fiancé waited for me to meet his family. We had dinner at their place, the women were not permitted to talk while the men were in the room, also no eye contact with the men, and we had to eat separately. He says he wants me to learn to be a good and decent wife from them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 090

You deserved it 247

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 421

You deserved it 2 688

Ilikeurfmls 13

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:03

Why do you assume she would have sex with you?

doctorhook86 24

Thursday 16 August 2012 0:13

This FML smells like it was written by someone under age 20...

Comments

zuzupetalsYO 11

Thursday 16 August 2012 5:32

Your crush is a ****? Bonus! There's always tomorrow.

SoultheWolf 19

Thursday 16 August 2012 5:44

I love how you assume you will get laid after a date...

asherm 15

Thursday 16 August 2012 5:47

Relax young grasshopper! All good things in time. You don't know she would have taken your v-card, but if you ask for a rain check and explain that your having dinner with your grandma, she may be more impressed with you. Don't be a douche

CamcAmIaM 10

Thursday 16 August 2012 5:48

Think of it this way, now you don't have to waste your time chasing the opposite sex. The time you waste in a relationship could be MUCH better spent on your future career.