Miscellaneous: Today, I found out that my friends only hang out with me so they... - FML

By Anonymous - 21/02/2016 21:48 - United States - Merrimack

Today, I found out that my friends only hang out with me so they can play with my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 769

You deserved it 2 426

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/05/2011 05:48 - United States

Today, I realized I have more dogs than I do friends. I have two dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 597

You deserved it 6 741

Jealousy

By Karine - 05/12/2023 00:00 - France - Bordeaux

Today, my dog has a better social life than I do. He has more playdates scheduled than I have actual human plans this month. I'm officially my dog's social secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 217

Loner

By Anonymous - 16/03/2023 16:00 - New Zealand

Today, my dog has a better social life than I do, since he's been invited to more doggy birthday parties than I've been invited to regular parties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 151

With friends like these…

By z…… - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - Greece

Today, I found out my "best friends" have gone on a crazy weekend and they didn't invite me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 649

You deserved it 4 941

Et tu, Chandler?

By Anonymous - 18/08/2019 14:00

Today, I found out that when my friends say they're too busy to hang out with me, what they really mean is that they're going to have an awesome pool party, and don't want me to come. The Instagram stories say it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 904

You deserved it 191

By Neednewfriends - 11/11/2015 14:38 - Australia

Today, I found out that my "friends" only invite me to their parties when they need a designated driver. Apparently I'm "not fun" because I don't drink, which "ruins the party". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 412

You deserved it 2 668

By Anonymous - 20/07/2010 16:29 - United States

Today, I found out my parents are getting divorced. They're fighting over the dog instead of my sister and me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 929

You deserved it 3 938

Friends?

By iAmJasper - 17/09/2014 21:56 - United States - Sun Prairie

Today, my friends came over to my house to eat my food and make fun of me as they played on my Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 418

You deserved it 8 878

By Anonymous - 09/10/2010 04:06 - United States

Today, I found out that my current girlfriend has dated all of my friends at one time or another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 978

You deserved it 5 195

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 20:59 - Canada - Dartmouth

Today, I realized that the only times I get to hang out with my friends outside of school are when one of them accidentally mentions plans in front of me and they are obligated by social protocol to invite me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 697

You deserved it 3 241

Next

Top comments

organizse 28

Monday 22 February 2016 13:51

Damn... That's a bitch

dkane 12

Monday 22 February 2016 13:54

Go find some new friends Op, that will hangout with you because you're you.

Comments

anthonydpalm 18

Monday 22 February 2016 16:43

Sorry to hear that OP. Stop talking to your "friends" and get more dogs. At least the dogs will like you for who you are!

BiGTiMeNeRD 29

Monday 22 February 2016 17:02

Plot twist: "dog" is what he calls his penis.

masschris 17

Monday 22 February 2016 17:06

I only go to my dads to play with their dog. Best family member in the house!

whatunicorn 17

Monday 22 February 2016 17:26

Well... it could be worse right??? On the plus side your dog must be amazing.

zyero 9

Monday 22 February 2016 18:01

We cool dog

loueasy 23

Monday 22 February 2016 18:21

That's ruff

Murilirum 23

Monday 22 February 2016 19:18

That's why you get a dog.

disneyfreak 10

Monday 22 February 2016 19:48

Time to get new friends

GrumpyGrinch 23

Monday 22 February 2016 19:52

At least you have a great dog! Years ago one of my ex-friends only got people attend her birthdays on a condition that her grandmother will be there. Grandmother was a perfect lady that everybody wanted to be friends with, never mind 60 years age gap. After grandmother passed the grandchild couldn't keep a single friend on its own.

BreM16 23

Tuesday 23 February 2016 5:38

How is this supposed to make OP feel better?

GEBEH 14

Monday 22 February 2016 20:11

Yo dawg! no not you Simon, shut up!

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Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games Gamers Ironic Zoom

The Top

Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 623

You deserved it 42 685

Today, I was denied food stamp assistance. Apparently, you need to work 20 hours a week while being a full time student to qualify or have a work study. I was recently suspended from my work study for calling off because my aunt died, and if I worked 20 hours a week, why would I need food stamps? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 150

You deserved it 5 868

The Top

Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask out my crush, only to find out that they're already in a committed relationship with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 155

Today, while cleaning, I found a grocery bag with thongs in it. I took them out, smiled and jokingly asked my wife, who never wears them, if she's keeping secrets from me. Turns out she isn't and the bag is not hers. It's belongs to my 76-year-old grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 115

You deserved it 783

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218 463

You deserved it 15 332

Today, I was at a waterpark with my friends, waiting in line for about 45 minutes to go on the biggest ride there. When it was finally our turn, the lifeguard at the top pulled me over and measured me to see if I was tall enough. I wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 472

Today, at my job serving, I went to clear the plates when a guy said, "Hold on a second." Thinking he wasn't quite finished, I went to put the plate back. He then reached into his mouth, pulled out a dark brown object and threw it on the plate. It was a rotten tooth. I almost puked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 727

You deserved it 2 167

Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 013

You deserved it 115 356