Intimacy: Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have...

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By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 06:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 062

You deserved it 76 114

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Same thing different taste

By MarkQ95 - 21/07/2013 23:58 - Ireland

Today, trying to flirt with a girl, I was trying to make it out as if I had a great sex life. I got stuck between saying "100% customer satisfaction" and "no complaints" and blurted out "100% customer complaints." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 843

You deserved it 59 783

Bad start

By Anonymous - 04/08/2014 23:04 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 274

You deserved it 9 190

Thanks

By Miami6and3 - 26/08/2013 18:22 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I didn't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 500

You deserved it 5 319

No

By grlks - 19/02/2009 07:08 - United States

Today, I told a girl that I liked her. She replied, "Don't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 115

You deserved it 5 889

By Anonymous - 10/03/2013 07:52 - United States

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 069

You deserved it 9 248

No thanks

By Anonymous - 28/03/2021 14:01

Today, it's been since 2014 that I've been looking for a girlfriend, and the average response I've gotten was no. Today I got, "Ew, hell no." FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 185

By ohmylordy - 29/10/2010 05:48 - United States

Today, while talking with my girlfriend about dating, I learned that she has had more girlfriends than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 366

You deserved it 6 667

By Numou - 08/12/2008 07:26 - France

Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous. She replied, "Well actually, I am, I just can't prove it cause no one else is interested in you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 951

You deserved it 4 257

By Nox - 06/01/2010 07:25 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 598

You deserved it 7 708

Nag nag nag

By Anonymous - 06/03/2025 18:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend complained about our recent dry spell. I've been under a lot of stress at work, but I told her some things she could do to help. She decided a better idea was to scream that I don't care about her needs, and that I should never "burden her" with my problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 126

imustbeinsane 2

Tuesday 6 December 2011 11:41

Now you got 100 problems and a bitch is one

StoryOfTheYear 14

Tuesday 6 December 2011 11:39

YDI?

Comments

White_Knightspc 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 0:44

You don't deserve a hot girl. You deserve a swift kick in the ass! !!!DUMBASS!!!

beebananaz88 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 0:49

You only say that to ugos silly!

athos1237 4

Wednesday 7 December 2011 0:56

Smooth. So you just told the girl who showed interest in you that you have no interest in her.

laurenXD 1

Wednesday 7 December 2011 1:09

Nice.

bubo_fml 10

Wednesday 7 December 2011 1:10

Well june-yah...I say..."No Woman, No Cry!"

YourFriendSky 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 1:35

Being an attractive girl, If I were to be in that situation, I'd be laughing while saying, "Right on bro! Right on." I congratulate him, that's some funny shyt.

Locoluis 15

Wednesday 7 December 2011 1:57

Forever alone

hannahroth96 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 2:04

I'm a girl, & if a guy said that to me I'd laugh my ass off.

paperdoll14 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 2:16

OP, you smooth talker you. I bet you say that to all the girls and...you shouldn't. Note: some girls may find that kind of thing funny but, even Jay Z would probably advise you to know your audience. Being that this girl had to ask if you had a girlfriend you most likely don't know her well enough to make any assumptions about her sense or style of humor.