Miscellaneous: Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since...

By BadGuyLuck - 25/02/2012 06:33 - United States

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 979

You deserved it 2 802

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Same thing different taste

By veebenjoo - 28/06/2011 05:35 - United States

Today, I got asked out for the first time in my life. During a prank call. By a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 918

You deserved it 4 318

Hard no

By unemployable - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had an important job interview. The interviewer really seemed to like me. Instead of hiring me, he asked me out on a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 297

You deserved it 3 587

By foreveralone - 23/07/2013 09:51 - New Zealand - Torbay

Today, I was finally asked out on a date after a year of being single. Turns out he got the wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 970

You deserved it 3 551

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 995

You deserved it 3 366

Distant love

By jadalaheart - 28/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Citrus Heights

Today, for the first time in more than two years, a guy asked me out. Too bad he lives halfway around the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 806

You deserved it 204

By (._. ) - 06/08/2013 20:35 - United States - Alburnett

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd have to ask his dad if it was OK. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "Come on, Dad" and "But why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 777

You deserved it 5 129

By Anonymous - 07/12/2018 20:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 929

You deserved it 207

Interested parties

By Anonymous - 20/12/2023 00:00 - Canada - Mont-Saint-Hilaire

Today, one of my guy friends, who I’m not interested in romantically, asked me out on a date. This is the third time a "friend" has asked me out on a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 325

You deserved it 527

By Anonymous - 03/12/2010 21:18 - Argentina

Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 601

You deserved it 3 297

By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 20:15 - Canada

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 861

You deserved it 6 401

epicwaffles 7

Saturday 25 February 2012 16:09

You are learning, young padawan.

Redoxx_fml 22

Saturday 25 February 2012 16:12

And marry his mother?

Comments

obedsiawor 0

Sunday 26 February 2012 3:09

Sounds like some Oedipus stuff

linkinpark98 23

Sunday 26 February 2012 3:48

That to me seems like the best date ever. You guys could have talked about your fathers together!

Lette_4_Life 2

Sunday 26 February 2012 4:45

sounds like my ex. what was his name??

CadetAdler 0

Sunday 26 February 2012 5:37

At least he has some sort of life goal.

beloved17 0

Sunday 26 February 2012 6:05

instead of writting the bad news here,you can either tell the police or his father,maybe you can save someone's life moron....jesus christ! yes...fyl

gparsley 6

Sunday 26 February 2012 6:45

Holy shit tht is creepy

whistlepig21 0

Sunday 26 February 2012 7:18

Third times the charm ;)

Eaglestrike117 29

Sunday 26 February 2012 8:28

Does he want to marry his mother too? God damn Freudian philosophy.

daizttgg 9

Sunday 26 February 2012 8:36

"Luke I am ur father. " ... (revised) "BULL SHIT UR EVIL SO I'LL KILL U ANYWAY!" *le push off side* NOOOOO!!!!

leilaostara 1

Sunday 26 February 2012 9:34

Kinky ;D

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 039

You deserved it 2 034

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 572

You deserved it 52 888

The Top

Today, I spent an hour explaining to a college student how you could have a baby and not be married. He still doesn't get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 763

You deserved it 4 560

Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthy conversation, my girlfriend mentioned, "And he always farts during sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 222

You deserved it 10 819

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 731

You deserved it 3 454

Today, I'm getting married. I woke up with no voice to say my I dos with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 583

You deserved it 252

Today, I had to send out yet another email reminding families that everyone must be fully dressed while in view of the screen. This includes the student, any other children and the adults in the home. I teach first grade. It’s almost a weekly occurrence to have to send these. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 368

You deserved it 154

Today, I was subpoenaed on behalf of my mother-in-law. My husband said if I didn't defend her and consequently lie under oath, our marriage is over. She said, "I can get rid of two problems in one day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 801

You deserved it 767

Same thing different taste

Hard no

Distant love

Interested parties

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