Work: Today, I got in a car accident on the way to work. I received...

By patch91 - 05/04/2011 02:03

Today, I got in a car accident on the way to work. I received an abusive phone call from my boss saying he shouldn't have to cover my lazy ass. I was driving to cover his shift because he was too drunk to show up to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 924

You deserved it 3 194

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Same thing different taste

By Mycardoesn'tevenwork - 22/02/2016 20:16 - United States

Today, I was in a car accident on the way to work. I called my boss and told him I had to deal with the police and the accident report and didn't know how long it would take. He got mad and said I "should have picked a better time to do this". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 021

You deserved it 1 523

By in pain - 15/03/2011 22:57

Today, I got into a bad car accident, where I got severe whiplash, swollen knees, and cuts everywhere. I called my boss to let him know I wouldn't be able to make it in and he fired me for being 'not dependable'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 497

You deserved it 3 667

I can't take it anymore

By genn - 23/05/2023 18:00

Today, I called into work because I was too tired to keep my eyes open. My boss berated me over the phone, saying I should be more like that other employee who came in with a broken toe. That was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 833

You deserved it 114

Nice to know

By Sarah - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 188

You deserved it 1 801

By TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - 21/11/2014 06:11 - United States - San Diego

Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 795

You deserved it 4 115

Emergency

By Ethan Sitzes - 25/06/2022 22:00

Today, I called into work because of a family emergency. My boss was understanding; my coworker? He tore me a new one because his wife wanted him to take the day off, which he didn't because it was going to be a tough day at work. He also threatened to find a way he could get me fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 097

You deserved it 99

By Coach - 30/10/2009 13:19 - United States

Today, I was woken up from a phone call from my boss. He asked if I had been asleep. I told him I wasn't, that I was in my car on the way to work. Then my alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 343

You deserved it 41 630

By Nojob - 06/06/2018 09:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, on my way to my job interview, the man who was supposed to be interviewing me slammed into my car because he wasn’t paying attention. He fired me for raising his insurance premiums. I got fired before getting the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 196

You deserved it 200

By idiot - 09/07/2012 21:26 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my car waiting my shift to start. I must've fallen asleep because I woke up to a call from my boss firing me. I was in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 086

You deserved it 23 538

By Anonymous - 09/07/2016 15:14

Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 982

You deserved it 913

mikedivine28 5

Tuesday 5 April 2011 9:12

Free pass to show up to work drunk tomorrow..

InnocentLies 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 9:09

Can you quit that job?

Comments

callofduty4life 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 9:48

Maybe your boss wouldn't yell at you if you wasn't such a bad employee.

rsmmsm 1

Tuesday 5 April 2011 9:59

what kind of ****** up boss does that??

rattusrattus 18

Tuesday 5 April 2011 10:09

I would second that, and add w*nker, pillock and berk to the list.

Snackbars 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 10:11

Well maybe you shouldn't let him drive.

LoneStarTexan 6

Tuesday 5 April 2011 10:16

*face palm* wow

DropBearHunter 8

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:14

*Synchronised double facepalm*

Grimmerie 31

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:41

post-natal abortion, anyone?

T3P33_fml 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 0:25

Falcon punch works from 1s. to 200years after inpregnantation.

TheNewGuy03 28

Wednesday 6 April 2011 9:09

in...PREGNANTATION?!?!??!? don't mind me; i'm just having a seizure over here. HAAAAALP |the kid|

RyDawg918 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 10:16

ydi for being lazy

ReynshineCutting 10

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:28

22 you deserve everything in life for your shirt. HOOK 'EM HORNS!

Based 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 10:38

More like c-c-c-comment breaker!

DropBearHunter 8

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:20

So your boss abused you because he had to work his shift... Wow what a twat.

rudie_fml 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:30

what an asshole boss

rudie_fml 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:32

I like turtles!!

TheNewGuy03 28

Tuesday 5 April 2011 15:26

we have something in common, thus making us soulmates. congrats. |the kid|

denvan 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 11:33

What a douche of a boss for abusing Recovery Monday

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The Top

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my family. While they were singing Happy Birthday to me, my mother called me by my brother's name. When I blew out the candles a moment later, I joked, "I wish my mother could remember which son I am." Before we had even started eating the cake, she called me by my father's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 79

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 263

You deserved it 7 133

The Top

Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 441

You deserved it 36 980

Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 467

You deserved it 6 378

Today, I was trying to relieve a dog that looked like it was choking because it was tied to a pole while its owner was in a restaurant. The owner called a security guard because she was convinced I was trying to steal her dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 174

You deserved it 4 706

Today, at the job I've had for eight years, I finally got the raise I was supposed to get a year ago. One hour later I found out the store was closing and we were all out of a job in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 484

You deserved it 2 265

Today, I was home alone in the dark and I heard the doorbell ring. I didn't know who it was so I didn't answer. They kept ringing, so I got a bit scared and called the police. When the police showed up, they told me it was a Chinese delivery guy with the wrong address. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 2 009

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 467

You deserved it 2 557

Same thing different taste

I can't take it anymore

Nice to know

Emergency

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