okay thats a little to far wouldnt you say?

exactly. obviously op's doing something.

64, eh life isn't just about an education. There's more to life than work man. Parties can be great fun. They can be shit. But that's life. I've never heard of someone being specifically uninvited to a party in all my life.

yeah, but life is based around education, that's how we have the doctors, lawyers, etc. that actually help us get through life, and the ones who clean up fights and crap from the parties, and the police who have to deal with all the drama from those parties. They don't send you to 12 years of school for nothing. I find that education is more fun, you have more to be proud of. Parties don't give anything to be proud of. I'm 37, and by the time you get to my age, parties have meant nothing, you're useless to society without education. Parties don't pay the bills, legally that is. I don't even let my 16 year old go to parties, and I know tons of my teen's friends go to parties already and don't even graduate high school because of them. Then again, the ones who choose to go partying, need to have self control.

Parties don't pay the bills. Of course not. There's a balance. It's having a semblance of responsibility. Knowing when to party and when not to. I partied a lot during college. Still got a 2:1 degree in one of the top european business schools and a great job in my field with a top firm getting great experience. I'm half way towards my professional accreditation at the moment. I still go to parties/clubs and drink a lot, but I can balance it. Getting an education and securing your future is very important, but there's a lot to be said for having fun along the way. Whatever that may be for someone.

Look at it in your way, then... If OP was UNINVITED, that means he's disliked, which will lead down the path of self-hatred, which very few times leads to success. It helps to have connections in certain fields.. Hard to make them when people actually dislike you. Sure, you can get a business degree.. Who are you gonna work for? A lot of places want someone who can have fun, not just work, otherwise they'll be a pain to work with.. And possibly kill themselves one day There's a balance.

I agree. That wasn't my point at all. My point was that socialising (at parties or whatever) is very important.

Life is not all about work. Yes education and learning is fun, but you can't live in a bubble your whole life. Do you allow your child to socialize at all? How is she ever going to learn to face life's challenges and be able to judge right from wrong if you don't allow her to do so? I'm not trying to judge your parenting style; I'm really just curious to the motives behind it.

I was always raised to work more and party less, or not party at all. I partied, sure I did while in college. I already have 2 careers and going on a 3rd. My son is allowed to socialize, just not at parties that have alcohol. You can have the same experiences without partying. I just don't see how partying benefits lives, it didn't benefit mine at all, it almost ruined my chances of graduating college the first time 18 years ago. I don't see myself living in a bubble, the way I see work, is doing something you love, which is what I do. If you do a career you love, there's no need to party, plus you get paid for it. I'm more strict with my son because he broke several rules, and it's really not a good feeling as a parent to see a police man and your kid at your front step asking if the kid is your child, I've experienced that, so it's now limited my sons ability to socialize, because he socialized with kids who party, which ended up with him taking a ride with the police. Basically, that's why I say what I say because of personal experiences. I've been on both sides of the rope, it's no fun on either side. I'm saying this from a parents point of view, and honesty, to me, if you love your child, you're going to be more protective when it comes to them partying and such, and I'm not over protective either. I've learned from my parents because of how I grew up, that if you don't abuse privileges of going out to parties and socializing with self control, you're parents aren't going to be as strict. So, I guess you could say that's my motive.

Well, since you put it that way, it makes tons of sense. Kids are also not all the same, while one kid will go to a party and make the right choices (either not drinking, or not getting plastered, or not driving drunk, whatever), the next one will take it to the limit and beyond. So while, like for instance, my mom is a lenient parent and let me get away with a lot as a teen (and even now, I'm only 21 and still under her roof) -- however, I'm also chicken, which keeps me out of trouble, and my mother knows this, thus she is able to trust that I'll make the right decision. Your son is obviously not chicken, lol. Risk-taker kids tend to get in a bit more trouble, thus need more supervision and discipline. Argument valid. :)

stifler partyed all the time.... i learned from him and now i have a 4.0 gpa aannnddd i get poon at them parties dawg

Yeah, I was chicken as as a teen. I didn't start partying until college and had lots of peer pressure. I never abused privileges as a teen, the latest I ever stay out was maybe 1am, but that was coming home from a church dance... yes I am religious, and obvious have never been a good one. I changed my ways after I almost screwed over my college year. I guess you could call it shock therapy. It's true, every kid is different, it's just as to what extent. I have 2 other younger kids (ages 8 and 4, my oldest is 16). I've seen how they each are, they're night and day from each other. Not one is like the other, so I have to raise them the same, but in different ways per se, and I bet that one will be more risky than the other once they get older. As a parent, when things happen as a result to partying, it's very upsetting and makes you feel like a failure to one extent as a parent, even though you know that you did the best you could. It's also not fun when you lose trust with the kid due to their partying habits and have to "unlock" the chip in their cellphone to track when and where they are at all times. I wish my son was chicken. Then he could have stayed out of trouble as a teen like I did, now he has, basically, a permanent record (not for anything too serious, but serious enough for a record) for the rest of his life. I'd say, given that you're 21, if you're doing schooling and preparing for a career, than I'd say it's seems okay to still be under your mothers roof.

Yeah, it's a bit frustrating at times because I'm starting to develop "need to get out of the nest" syndrome, but I only have one year of college left and I can be on my own. If that means one more year in the nest, that's okay. I'd rather have a roof over my head and behave a little more than to go hog-wild and be sleeping in my car.