Miscellaneous: Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been...

By iheartvodka - 07/11/2009 06:55 - United States

Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been reported missing. My friends online decided to call the police because I haven't signed in for 6 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 675

You deserved it 6 706

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Same thing different taste

Panic

By Anonymous - 26/02/2021 02:01

Today, I spent the night at a friend's house after drinking. My phone died and I didn’t charge it. My mom decided I was a missing person, and all of her friends on Facebook decided to post that I was missing. I’m a 27 year-old adult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 028

You deserved it 128

By Ava_Darkflame - 01/01/2017 15:54 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 514

You deserved it 168

Never try this at home

By Anonymous - 06/08/2023 13:00 - United States - Grass Valley

Today, a bunch of cops showed up at my house demanding to see my wife to make sure she was OK. Turns out my insane out-of-state daughter swatted me, calling 911 to tell them I had tied up my wife, and been impersonating her for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 134

By fire0fisis - 03/02/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 118

You deserved it 2 315

By Suprise - 17/08/2013 04:38 - United States

Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 093

You deserved it 8 941

By Poopamus - 23/04/2019 14:00

Today, the police showed up at my door asking if I told this creepy guy stalking my girlfriend that I'll chop him up and bury each piece in a different country if he doesn't stop bothering my girl. I told them I did, along with an explanation. Turns out, he's been missing since that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 179

You deserved it 618

Freak out

By use your brain mother - 16/06/2015 05:47 - United States - Springville

Today, I told my mom I was going hiking with a couple of friends and wouldn't be back for four or more hours. Not even two hours later, she called the cops and reported us as missing. She didn't realize that we wouldn't have service up the canyon so we could call her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 744

You deserved it 2 364

By GDBeast - 09/01/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 466

You deserved it 6 317

By Nucleus - 08/10/2015 13:48 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, I complained about being bored to death on Facebook. Someone took it as a suicide threat and called the police. They showed up at my apartment and my workplace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 269

You deserved it 3 470

By maf811 - 07/11/2011 12:13 - United States

Today, my mother panicked and was about to report me missing when I didn't answer her calls while I was at a movie. I'm 31, and have lived on my own for over 10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 030

You deserved it 2 793

marshmallowmouse 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 11:51

it's...nice that they...care? XD

Tristalyn 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 11:53

So they knew enough about you for a cop to come to your door but they couldn't find your phone number to just call first?

Comments

WokeUpThisMornin 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:07

brilliant, but i don't believe.

jchansfan 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:18

Its kinda cute in a weird way... At least they worry about your safety and well being... =)

Narzhul 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:31

I like how a lot of people associate being online everyday for any amount of time is the equivalent of having no life at all.

dogfood_fml 3

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:38

That's not an FML. Your friends care about you.

Butcher_1419 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:43

at least they didn't report your car as stolen so next time you get pulled over you get yanked out of your own car at gunpoint. :-o

kravitzz1990 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:58

#27 thats wat someone wif no life would say!! lol

lexi_cacao 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 15:01

well said, #13.

katsoplat 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 15:05

You should be happy that your friends care about you :|

blastvortex 3

Saturday 7 November 2009 15:23

Haha. You're friends are quite amusing. Be thankful that they care. Give me a break.

LzrdPsnsSpck 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 15:29

That's really funny, I love it.

Keywords

My ex Awkward Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Health Sports Proposal Cold weather Annoying Snow Cheating Work Money Relatable Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

Today, at my sister's engagement party, my cousins thought it would be funny to get my nanna drunk. They regretted it when she told them, and everyone else at the party about her sex life and how she fakes orgasms with my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 294

You deserved it 9 654

The Top

Today, I dropped my knitting project while I was sitting down, but I managed to catch it between my legs. So my knitting needles also caught me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 669

You deserved it 1 380

Today, I saw the engagement announcement for the girl I've been in love with for 10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 878

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 444

You deserved it 4 242

Today, I did a bike ride and run with a gent I'm serious about. On the run, I had a big lead until he passed me up saying, "I'm going to marry you." Puzzled that he would propose and then sprint away leaving me trailing, he clarified at the finish. His words: "I'm going to bury you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 287

You deserved it 5 386

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 221

You deserved it 4 332

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend had been encouraging me to send him 'personal' videos was so he could sell them online to porn websites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 655

You deserved it 19 383

Same thing different taste

Panic

Never try this at home

Freak out

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