Work: Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one...

By ellen77 - 13/09/2013 05:55 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 034

You deserved it 5 432

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 08:30 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 601

You deserved it 4 432

By whattabrat - 26/02/2012 05:16 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 079

You deserved it 3 297

By peestain - 25/10/2010 10:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 673

You deserved it 32 130

Make it stop

By Levi2411 - 31/12/2018 04:00

Today, I'm babysitting. The kids have only been home at the same time together for 15 minutes. Two of them have punched each other and the other is running in circles screaming. What is wrong with this picture? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 296

You deserved it 330

By 1D-107 - 31/07/2012 17:43 - United States - Logan

Today, I was babysitting three kids, one of whom was particularly difficult to control. While trying to get him to behave, the two girls came up behind me and pulled my pants down. In front of a huge window open to the street below. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 564

You deserved it 2 479

By TraumatizedMother - 02/10/2011 07:27 - United States

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 855

You deserved it 10 321

Sneaky

By Isoldael - 07/11/2011 09:38 - Netherlands

Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 086

You deserved it 5 108

By SadDad - 22/09/2012 18:11 - United States - Alexandria

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 369

You deserved it 9 816

By KPKallery - 05/06/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. I was sitting on the sofa when I felt that I need to ajust my sitting arangment. After moving, I felt a small toy snap under me. The little boy said it was fine. One hour later he snuck up on me and beat me with an umbrella for breaking his toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 802

You deserved it 11 748

Demon child

By never again! - 22/06/2021 02:01

Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was acting up, so instead of spanking him, I put him in the corner for timeout. He screamed and thrashed and kicked the walls so hard my neighbors called the police. My sister wasn’t answering her phone, and I had to explain why a 7-year-old was acting like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 076

You deserved it 126

xlord 27

Friday 13 September 2013 12:57

So you are dealing with a real life version of Chucky?

JoeyJaws68 18

Friday 13 September 2013 12:58

How long were things going well? 10 minutes?

Comments

darkfireflame 15

Saturday 14 September 2013 4:31

You should have joined the kid on the roof.

zaen 11

Saturday 14 September 2013 5:33

baby Rambo...

Kagrish 9

Saturday 14 September 2013 6:53

Are you babysitting Dennis the menace?

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 14 September 2013 7:43

First off, how did you not notice the kid taping a knife onto a toy gun? How old was this kid? And how old was the kid who climbed onto the roof in fear? Plus, how did the parents react? And did you get the kid down from the roof and get the weapon away from the other one? Sheesh.

LaUruguaya 11

Saturday 14 September 2013 14:32

How were you not able to stop them by the time they got all the way to the roof?? You sound like a sucky babysitter!

AlexRen 21

Saturday 14 September 2013 19:51

Tonight on: BabySitting the devil's Children.

baref00tmama 15

Sunday 15 September 2013 2:11

You sound like a totally incompetent babysitter. How did the child manage to get ahold of a knife? Why didn't you immediately get it away from him? How did he manage to get to the barbecue by himself? How did BOTH children manage to get outside unsupervised? Stop texting/Facebooking/Twittering/whatever-ing, and WATCH THE KIDS.