Miscellaneous: Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons... - FML

By Dat Stanky Mouf - 16/03/2013 21:52 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 260

You deserved it 3 600

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 15:54 - United States

Today, I had a long conversation with my fiancé about how smoking menthol cigarettes is not a substitute for brushing your teeth. He still isn't convinced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 330

You deserved it 3 727

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 912

You deserved it 38 049

Nice theory

By Anonymous - 04/09/2015 14:54 - Portugal - Alhandra

Today, my boyfriend thinks he's discovered a big conspiracy by dentists to sell toothpaste. He's arguing that nobody needs to brush their teeth, ever, because all the "new plaque" from food will dissolve the "old plaque", and the only thing he needs to use is breath spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 539

You deserved it 2 402

By Gahh... - 03/12/2012 05:18 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 039

You deserved it 2 960

He's probably right

By Anonymous - 25/05/2019 00:01

Today, I found out that my boyfriend thinks brushing his teeth is unnecessary, because, "the world is going to end because of climate change anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 926

You deserved it 211

By Laura - 03/05/2012 07:55 - France

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 346

You deserved it 2 606

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 092

You deserved it 40 037

Halitosis

By Anonymous - 13/10/2021 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 288

Clean

By gag! - 10/12/2022 00:00

Today, my boyfriend complained that I "treat him like a child" by asking him if he’s brushed his teeth before we kiss. Gee maybe if he brushed regularly like a fucking adult, I wouldn’t HAVE to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 216

Manchild

By lynnie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to come up with a reward system for getting my boyfriend to brush his teeth daily. He's 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 414

You deserved it 6 207

Next

Top comments

challan 19

Sunday 17 March 2013 10:39

4 out 5 dentists agree that your boyfriend will have Summer Teeth. Some are here... Some are gone.

apaloosa_fml_fml 21

Sunday 17 March 2013 11:31

You don't say?

Comments

itszlo 8

Monday 18 March 2013 0:24

Are his teeth pearly white?!

PocketFox 10

Monday 18 March 2013 0:40

I dunno, according to a Cracked article I read not too long ago, they actually are developing gums that clean your teeth for you. Maybe your boyfriend's just ahead of the curve?

xs4u 13

Monday 18 March 2013 1:52

ever heard of "stupid"?

DMAC12 5

Monday 18 March 2013 3:44

It Dose if your throwing them at the doctors

thenewgirl29 20

Monday 18 March 2013 3:53

I read that same article but that's still gross. Oral hygiene is important. Especially to avoid the stereotype that people in the Uk have bad teeth. Lol jk

Songokuu9000 8

Monday 18 March 2013 3:56

He chews shit gum?

ravenlovesplaid 5

Monday 18 March 2013 4:43

That's gross

thosedogtags 8

Monday 18 March 2013 5:04

Maybe your boyfriend hasn't quite grown up yet? Or he just doesn't care about his health and appearance.. Hmmmm.

onorexveritas 23

Monday 18 March 2013 7:08

sucks you had to

cheshireau 26

Monday 18 March 2013 13:36

Is this the same FMLer that used ****-load?

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The Top

Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 723

You deserved it 13 099

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 080

The Top

Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was watching the episode where Spongebob smashes his guitar while playing. I walk into the kitchen to make him a snack, and I hear a loud crash... My nephew smashing my brand new guitar to be like Spongebob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 905

You deserved it 4 512

Today, I was called a "whore," a "demon," a "piece of shit," and a "disrespectful bitch." All of this happened because I wouldn't let my mother-in-law borrow my car. This is a woman with multiple speeding tickets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 101

You deserved it 3 107

Today, my boyfriend kicked me out and threatened to get a restraining order after I called him an asshole. I'm 16 weeks pregnant and over 1,000 miles away from my parents' house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 912

You deserved it 9 204

Today, my sister told me that the only reason I like one guy is because he looks exactly like the guy that dumped me. I showed her two pictures to argue against it, and ended up proving her right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 125

You deserved it 5 821

Today, I got my hand caught in a belt sander while sanding down what was supposed to become a "Caution" sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 373

Today, my bank overdrafted my account to pay a bill that isn't due until next month. When I called them, they said they would fix the mistake, but I have to restore the account to zero before they'll give me my money back. So, I have to pay for my own money with the money they won't give me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 427

You deserved it 2 249