Kids: Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that The Interview...

By Anonymous - 17/01/2015 18:11 - Australia - Perth

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that The Interview wasn't a documentary and that Kim Jong-un wasn't actually assassinated by a pair of goofy reporters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 493

You deserved it 6 313

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Same thing different taste

By Ange - 15/01/2012 19:34 - United States

Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 464

You deserved it 5 104

By parenting sucks - 01/07/2011 17:42 - United States

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 596

You deserved it 5 373

By Anonymous - 03/02/2012 07:58 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 936

You deserved it 4 357

By DeepFriedLettuce - 29/04/2016 01:33 - United States - Vashon

Today, I had to explain to my seventeen year-old daughter that deep frying food doesn't "melt the calories." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 450

You deserved it 1 532

By auraya1985 - 12/09/2015 21:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I got called into the school by my daughter's teacher. Apparently my daughter informed her class that over the weekend she spent her time with her daddy watching porn stars while her mummy was at work. It took a long time to convince her they were actually watching a TV show called "Pawn Stars". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 354

You deserved it 1 891

By Nightmare - 15/01/2013 14:41

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 063

You deserved it 4 745

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 04:44 - United States - Buena Park

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old daughter to remove the handcuffs her father had placed on her as a joke. He didn't know they were real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 860

You deserved it 2 519

Too realistic

By ThatLove - 05/04/2023 18:00 - Switzerland - Worb

Today, I had to explain to my housemate that the cast of "The Crown" is not the real Royal Family impersonating themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 109

Absentee

By Superdad - 22/06/2022 06:00

Today, I told my daughter her mom was busy fighting aliens, so I wouldn’t have to tell her that her mom is just a shitty, self-absorbed bitch, who doesn’t deserve kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 1 092

Shame! Shame!

By Anonymous - 05/03/2022 12:00

Today, my daughter is so out of touch with anything not related to her phone and her social popularity that she doesn't know who Hitler was. I had to show her on YouTube, and while we aren't religious anymore, we are a Jewish family so this is an extra level of parental shame for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 806

You deserved it 612

whatsittoyabitch 15

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:10

Buy her a book. Any book.

Pleonasm 35

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:08

You mean I haven't been watching snuff films at the movie theater all my life? Well there goes my lack of moral fiber. Thanks OP, you asshole.

Comments

SarcasticShade 16

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:20

Screw you Dave.

GunSlinger69 19

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:24

Nice daughter you got there, but seriously, the fact that kim jong un was offended by such a shitty movie is beyond me.

horendale 11

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:28

sorry to tell you pall but your daughter is dumb as shit... wait I would be insulting shit by saying that

sstahpp 33

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:48

WHAT?!?!?!?!?!

shadysheikj 14

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:52

They hate us cuz they anus

Johnnycake23 42

Sunday 18 January 2015 0:58

Time to interview a new daughter OP

The_Avatar 22

Sunday 18 January 2015 1:28

No offense but your daughter is an idiot. Get her ass a tutor... Or three...

Lalala579121 27

Sunday 18 January 2015 18:59

I think it's her brain that's the problem, not her ass.

BlindlyWandering 17

Monday 19 January 2015 17:42

For her sake I hope she has a nice ass. If she can't be smart, at least she can be pretty.

DrHothead 15

Sunday 18 January 2015 1:29

God damn SPOILER ALERT***

StickyPickles 33

Sunday 18 January 2015 1:30

Kelly Bundy in real life?

sadistmonkey 19

Sunday 18 January 2015 1:48

WHAT? Seriously? Next you're gonna tell me that Eminem is NOT gay!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 334

You deserved it 4 255

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 157

The Top

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 189

You deserved it 21 643

Today, my 71-year-old grandmother survived cancer for the fourth time. I'm grateful, but at the same time I find myself feeling sad that she will soon be gone. She has COPD and constantly mentions that she is going to die soon. I wish I could build a time machine and go back to before she became terminally ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 921

You deserved it 108

Today, I got a concussion at work. Our resident schizophrenic decided to test how gravity worked by dropping a torch over the bannister directly onto my head. I'm still seeing stars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 702

You deserved it 1 380

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As the dentist was working on my teeth, he accidentally sprayed water all over my face. I couldn't stop laughing nervously, which made the dentist think I was choking. He ended up calling for backup and I had to explain that I was just laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 139

Today, I was fired for the first time in my life from a job that I actually loved and was passionate about. Apparently, none of my coworkers liked me and they thought that was a good enough reason to fire me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 086

You deserved it 683

Today, I received an email saying that the present I ordered for my girlfriend's birthday will be a week late, which makes it a week late for her birthday. I sat down and said we needed to talk, she burst into tears and apologised for 'sleeping with him,' I just wanted to tell her it would be late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 538

You deserved it 2 886

Same thing different taste

Too realistic

Absentee

Shame! Shame!

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