Intimacy: Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it...

By Username - 20/06/2011 15:57 - United States

Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 681

You deserved it 4 261

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Same thing different taste

Excuse me

By Anonymous - 30/03/2015 10:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 321

You deserved it 3 801

Family Matters

By whyme102008 - 13/07/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 152 111

You deserved it 8 671

Whatcha do when they come for you?

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 20:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 901

You deserved it 4 386

Dumbasses

By stay in there - 17/04/2020 23:00

Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 272

You deserved it 314

Caught

By fuck - 09/11/2013 23:30 - United States - Hubert

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 424

You deserved it 5 280

By GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 138

You deserved it 559

Caught in 4K

By RBergman - 25/04/2015 20:05 - United States - Basin

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 820

You deserved it 3 364

Confinement's gonna be fun

By Anonymous - 16/03/2020 23:01

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 396

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 560

You deserved it 5 052

Pranked!

By RetroDayDreamer - 10/09/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 440

You deserved it 28 883

greg1234567890_fml 2

Monday 20 June 2011 19:01

whose bush was it?

green_eggs_and_h 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:03

At least you know your parents still love eachother.

Comments

evilravie 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:16

How sweet! way to go mom and dad!

pinkspaceboundro 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:17

hahah- did you I've a stern talking you about having sexual relations in public??

xXshadowrollerXx 6

Monday 20 June 2011 20:25

..What?

matt0794 1

Monday 20 June 2011 19:17

I would have left them for another day and said that they can do their "thing" there.

CJ77NT 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:22

I hope there wasn't poison ivy in tht bush

Hiilei 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:23

omg thats classic

SpeakingMyMind 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:26

Did they use Fire and Ice lubricant? XD

pickles1994 18

Tuesday 21 June 2011 2:44

FML reference ftw

iownyou777 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 23:42

love your pick is that a miniglider

textwork 4

Monday 20 June 2011 19:29

lol atleast it wasn't your grandparents

palltaru 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:29

you have awesome parents*

aguin8 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:29

hahaha that's great

Just_Peed 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:30

my gf and I did that!:D except we didn't get arrested x)

randomlettrrs 8

Monday 20 June 2011 20:36

me and my hand did :(

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 056

Today, I found out that when my best friend and I were kids, our parents would cancel playdates when either of us opted to not go to church. They said it would, "strengthen our faith." We are now both adults and staunch atheists for that reason, and we're spending way more time together to make up for this crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 144

The Top

Today, I was happy because my exact shirt and sweater were in Seventeen Magazine. They were in the "What not to wear" category. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 243

You deserved it 13 421

Today, thanks to a new form of birth control, I've now been having my period non-stop for six weeks. FML

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You deserved it 4 550

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 140

Today, I was yelled at by multiple people at work for not wearing any makeup. The only reason I don’t wear makeup is because my mom is guaranteed to make me cry before I leave the house every morning, so there’s no point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 117

Today, I found a wallet containing an ID card. I managed to track down the owner, who now is threatening to call the police if I don't return the 400 dollars that he insists were also in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 902

You deserved it 2 829

Today, since I had no lessons until 1 p.m., I headed out to the store to run errands. Our school has a strict policy against leaving the campus during school hours. I returned to a fire drill taking place. The fire assembly point? The student parking lot. All 900 students watched me drive in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 123

You deserved it 36 068

Same thing different taste

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