Sex, Grandparents and Intimacy: Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather...

By kawood - 30/03/2012 11:32 - United States

Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather by myself. During the five hours I was there, he insisted on sharing the intimate details of his many sexcapades that he has had since World War II. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 532

You deserved it 3 118

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Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By therewasnocurtain - 06/04/2015 20:07 - United States - Lewiston

Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 119

You deserved it 2 542

By notsoclean - 24/12/2010 21:14 - United States

Today, I was at the dentist's, getting my teeth cleaned. He thought it would be funny to suddenly go on in detail about the fantastic sex he and his wife had the night before. I was unable to speak the entire time. The dentist is my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 481

You deserved it 3 697

By yeah okay then - 03/08/2012 23:50 - United Kingdom - Brentwood

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 980

You deserved it 2 122

By Anonymous - 18/08/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, I was alone in the car with my grandma for five hours while she told me all about the multiple bladder infections she's had in the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 542

You deserved it 3 260

By lovingthis - 09/01/2013 16:48 - United States - Largo

Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 204

You deserved it 5 248

Pawpaw got game

By Anonymous - 19/09/2023 13:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my 80 year-old grandad is having more sex in his retirement home than I am as a married man. And by that I mean his care staff had to call me to say they found him having sex. That’s once this year, whereas I’ve not had sex with my wife in three years. I can’t afford to divorce her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 535

You deserved it 203

Testimony night

By Anonymous - 15/11/2019 18:00

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 958

You deserved it 514

Repeat offender

By Anonymous - 09/06/2022 02:00

Today, I was the only family member available to take my grandad to hospital, after he fell on a bottle in the shower and got it stuck up his ass. Again. I swear we need to start monitoring him in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 217

You deserved it 155

By Anonymous - 06/05/2013 08:35 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 692

You deserved it 6 604

By Anonymous - 14/07/2018 05:00

Today, my 92-year-old great-grandfather ran down the stairs in excitement, despite his severe arthritis. He told my great-grandmother that he was having the first erection in over 10 years, and grandma ordered me to leave so they could do it right there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 725

You deserved it 776

fistnazal 10

Friday 30 March 2012 16:30

Have you ever banged a nat'zee with lungs full of napalm?! ..Damn teenagers! With ther' books with faces own'em! Tweet'n n' twat'n! Brah't colors.. Listenin to little weezer's.. Whacker flackers.. And wizard khalifer's!!

maybeeiwill 11

Friday 30 March 2012 16:10

Lucky!

Comments

gambatte 0

Friday 27 April 2012 22:54

best advice you can get is from a seasoned vet! listen up!

AngrySailor 17

Saturday 3 August 2013 5:53

I have had similar conversations with my late grandfather. He sailed merchant marine through WWII then quit when he started a family. I can't understand why this is a FML. This is history at its finest. In a few years there won't be anyone who experienced WWII and these stories should be passed on. **** you for not listening. **** you for being closed minded and not thinking he ever got pussy. **** you sideways and dry. You didn't deserve to even hear those stories. That man told you his deepest secrets, shit he never told his wife and you write a FML. **** you OP did of fire and VD.