Health: Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my...

By SeeingLlamas - 17/04/2012 09:38 - United States - Knoxville

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 122

You deserved it 3 089

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By dmsmcd - 17/12/2010 09:48 - United States

Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 034

You deserved it 3 978

By Anonymous - 29/09/2014 12:06 - United States - Vallejo

Today, my insomnia wins. I'm too wired and awake to sleep, but too stoned on my sleeping pills to get up and do something productive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 530

You deserved it 4 682

LET ME SLEEP

By Goth - 07/12/2021 19:59 - Sweden

Today, I reached a total of 3 doctors, 1 therapist, 1 psychiatrist, and 5 prescribed medications, all because my body refuses to let me sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 108

Tired as hell

By Anonymous - 17/08/2021 02:01

Today, I have to wake up in 3 hours for work, the medicine that should've made me sleep 8 hours straight failed and I woke up an hour later, not being able to sleep anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 66

Best of both worlds

By Alyce - 05/12/2020 23:02 - United States - Lewistown

Today, I was finally diagnosed with insomnia. The trouble is, because of my physical disability, I also have diagnosed chronic fatigue. Barely can stay awake during the day, can't sleep at night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 91

By sadparty - 06/11/2009 06:05 - United States

Today, I suffered a mental breakdown. I told my roommates about it, and they decided to throw a very loud party while I was sobbing in my room, unable to sleep. My Xanax prescription ran out, I have no more sick days, and I have to wake up in two hours to work a ten hour day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 134

You deserved it 7 528

Ironic, isn't it?

By Sleepless - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, after countless nights of no sleep and only some spontaneous naps, I was finally seeing a sleeping doctor to analyze the problem. I missed the appointment because I ended up sleeping through my alarm after not being able to sleep at all last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 805

You deserved it 1 271

Cats give great advice like "Shit in a box!"

By can't sleep - 09/08/2019 00:01 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I can't sleep. I don't know what's crazier, the fact that I have been lying in bed, staring at the ceiling for about 5 hours, or that I have been asking my cat for advice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 336

You deserved it 270

Lost in the sauce

By Anonymous - 24/02/2023 13:00 - United States - Spokane

Today, I found out that the mice infestations I've been fighting for the last two weeks was actually a recurring series of tactile/visual/auditory hallucinations, a side effect of a normal, prescribed, dosage of ADHD meds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 125

By D - 03/09/2013 18:04 - United States - Pleasanton

Today, I had to calm my hallucinating mom after she accidentally overdosed on one of her pills, then spend ages trying to protect her from the "monkey" on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 346

You deserved it 2 730

spikedrummer49 6

Tuesday 17 April 2012 16:02

Ride the llama to the pharmacy! Or across a rainbow and have a grand adventure!

Ugi 26

Tuesday 17 April 2012 16:03

Have you considered that perhaps there really is a llama in your room?

Comments

SummerTime69 5

Wednesday 18 April 2012 13:36

Carrrrrrrrrllllllllllll!

infinity_390 3

Wednesday 18 April 2012 13:50

hey i'm not trying to be disrespectful, but if you know that you're hallucinating, then what's the issue? just forget about the llama.

Elendil_fml 10

Wednesday 18 April 2012 15:12

What if one of your friends snuck a llama in as a prank? Maybe you better try to feed him some hay to make sure.

pl1992 5

Wednesday 18 April 2012 15:28

Pet the llama

Heinousness 0

Wednesday 18 April 2012 15:52

Of course you can!! And it came true!!!!! Lucky you!!!!!!!!

mya1234 4

Wednesday 18 April 2012 17:37

lmfao! this made me laugh so hard!

froglegs96 0

Wednesday 18 April 2012 18:35

Okay let me get this straight. You are hallucinating a llama in your living room while on your computer perfectly writing this FML? Makes sense...

ravenxcorvinus 9

Wednesday 18 April 2012 19:46

llama, llama, duck!

E001mek 5

Wednesday 18 April 2012 20:57

greetings from Carl. the OTHER llama

hypnosis 0

Wednesday 18 April 2012 21:33

Smoke some weed

Keywords

Weddings Awkward Miscellaneous My ex Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Relatable Mental health Therapy Argument Kids Parenting Thanksgiving Covid Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Work Money

The Top

Today, I called off my engagement because I fell in love with my best friend of 10 years since we recently reconnected. I confessed my feelings to her and asked her out. She rejected me and said she only sees me as a friend. Now I’m completely single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 4 081

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 533

You deserved it 32 703

The Top

Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 801

You deserved it 2 175

Today, my first day of going to the gym, some gym bro dropped his weights, which you’re not supposed to do, right on the top of my foot. I have complex crush fractures in most of my foot bones, I’m going to need surgeries, probably metal pins, and I can’t put weight on it for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 801

You deserved it 134

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom, demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a goddamn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 328

You deserved it 5 796

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 664

You deserved it 61 252

Today, I proposed to a girl I'd been in love with for 6 years. I filled the balcony of the building where I'd first laid eyes on her with innumerable roses and, under the starlit sky, I did it. She later posted on facebook 'OMG. This geek I knew from high school did the FUNNIEST thing today'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 832

You deserved it 33 163

Today, my brother told me to, "Stop bitching and get over it" after I complained of pain from my stomach after invasive surgery. This from the guy who spends multiple hours a day playing Halo and whining about the stupid ways he got killed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 801

You deserved it 2 076