Miscellaneous: Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody... - FML

By liynda - 06/05/2011 01:49 - Canada

Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 076

You deserved it 15 575

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Same thing different taste

By HomeAlone - 24/04/2016 04:45 - United States

Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 880

You deserved it 21 305

Hello?

By SBae - 14/03/2016 15:49 - United States - Uniontown

Today, I waited for the single bathroom for a very long time. I finally knocked on the door and found no one was in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 019

You deserved it 9 231

Second time

By timon_n_pumbaa - 11/01/2020 09:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I found myself locked in a bathroom for the second time in my life. This time at least I was at home. I live alone. I had to break the window on the shower door and crawl out. Now, I need to crawl in/out to shower, brush my teeth and more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 1 246

By pottyhostage - 08/11/2010 21:26 - Sweden

Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 884

You deserved it 45 112

By wtfisgoingon - 28/04/2013 10:30 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 360

You deserved it 3 720

By Anonymous - 13/05/2012 15:12 - United States - Monson

Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 914

You deserved it 4 064

Not a night owl

By Fail - 04/02/2023 15:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I woke up at the ungodly hour of 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom. It was of course quite dark, and unbeknownst to me, the door was closed. I walked into it. Then I tried to open it, missed the door knob, and walked into the door again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 288

Lonely

By Anonymous - 13/01/2012 03:50 - United States

Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 697

You deserved it 29 977

Why hello there...

By Shocked - 28/01/2018 19:00

Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 696

You deserved it 434

By haunted - 23/10/2015 20:41 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I woke up at 2am and went to use the toilet. I sat there doing my business, when I heard a voice whisper my name from behind me. I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall. I screamed and ran back to my room, then went without sleep for the rest of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 573

You deserved it 2 415

Next

Top comments

xRegretItAll 3

Friday 6 May 2011 8:55

At least no one saw that.. (:

Isabel312 0

Friday 6 May 2011 8:54

awe. I'm sorry. maybe just a habit. I do it too.

Comments

DarthLoser 0

Friday 6 May 2011 15:27

funny man. funny man

notsocrazee 0

Friday 6 May 2011 15:34

poor baby :( all alone... and stupid.

klutzyduck1 24

Friday 6 May 2011 15:37

I just keep thinking...and? So what?

Gorillaninja 0

Friday 6 May 2011 15:41

well that is good that you have nice manners. without them, u would get some disturbing moments with u and the other person in the bathroom

elliedanceteam 0

Friday 6 May 2011 15:49

doesnt really belong on fml more like jatd or mila

Cookie4U 0

Friday 6 May 2011 16:08

a much better one would be "Today, before entiring my bathroom at home I knocked in the door to see if anyone was inside, a man replied "occupied" then I rememered I live alone FML"

schmedium 0

Friday 6 May 2011 16:13

Knock on brother, knock on!!

wtfmylifedude 8

Friday 6 May 2011 16:22

Forever Alone.

HeavyMetalViking 0

Friday 6 May 2011 16:28

This comment will randomly get thumbs down like the rest.

you_freak 7

Friday 6 May 2011 16:31

^ No

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 809

You deserved it 9 769

Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 90

The Top

Today, I got punched after telling my 11-year-old cousin that her period is "coming for her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 1 271

Today, I was on the phone with my mother. She asked me if I was going to make it to Christmas at home. I told her that I would try and make it home since it would be my grandma's last Christmas alive. To my luck, grandma was sitting in the car with my mother, and speaker phone was in use. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 603

You deserved it 37 902

Today, I had to delay the Father's Day dinner that I had to cook, so it wouldn't conflict with my wife and kids' gaming schedules. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 133

I'm just gonna walk away now...

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 106

Today, I need a new mattress. Last night, I slept on the floor. It was the best sleep I've had in a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 757

You deserved it 1 023

Today, I was talking with a friend and casually mentioned how close I live to a train station. She said that since we’re both about a day away from NYC, we should meet up there and have a girls trip. I thought it was an awesome idea. When I mentioned it to my fiancé, he freaked about money. The date isn’t even set yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 150