Today I met my soulmate, and his boyfriend. FML - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Soulpain - 24/10/2017 08:12

Today I met my soulmate, and his boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 21

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

GhostFox 33

Thursday 26 October 2017 23:29

Pretty obviously not your soulmate then, or at least not your romantic soulmate.

Comments

GhostFox 33

Thursday 26 October 2017 23:29

Pretty obviously not your soulmate then, or at least not your romantic soulmate.

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Relatable Mental health Work Awkward AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Cute Sleep Animals Dogs Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 772

You deserved it 3 931

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 803

The Top

Today, I found out the job I applied for in IT was offered to coworker. I'm going to school for it, she has no degree/desire/knowledge of it. She was my trainer, I literally worked beside her for 2.5 years, and kept saying, "I hope you get it, I'm not going to apply." It was offered 5 days ago, which I found out about from another coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 162

Today, I found out my niece will born in about two weeks. That's nice, right? It is… except for the fact that there will now be FIVE people in my family with a birthday in May. As if trying to plan for four birthday parties in three weeks wasn't bad enough. Why not five? FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 454

Today, I hired a babysitter, so my husband and I could spend some time together and work on our failing marriage. I dressed up. We went out. He got drunk and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 714

You deserved it 7 379

Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 368

You deserved it 5 754

Today, I was talking to my friend, who was telling me he's having suicidal thoughts lately. He then said he'd be back in a few minutes. Nearly an hour passed. I panicked, thinking he'd offed himself. Several minutes after I called the emergency services, he messaged me, saying "K, back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 442

You deserved it 3 244

Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 770

You deserved it 40 325