Intimacy: Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would...

By IbetIgotAIDS - 12/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 791

You deserved it 15 281

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Same thing different taste

By ekaay - 16/01/2018 15:00

Today, whilst cleaning the living room, I heard snickering coming from my bedroom. My two nephews had found my "play cupboard" and were blowing up condoms like balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 049

You deserved it 1 004

By frustrated - 17/08/2013 22:56 - Ireland - Killarney

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 146

You deserved it 7 411

By the_lonely_life - 27/06/2013 01:02 - United States

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 166

You deserved it 7 048

By kahemae44 - 27/10/2009 10:20 - United States

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 418

You deserved it 5 563

TMI FML

By eugh - 07/05/2021 14:01 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I discovered the brand of condoms my parents use. It was in the same grocery bag as my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 576

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 53 110

By ADickySituation - 05/05/2013 04:14 - United States - Wilmette

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 876

You deserved it 4 938

Gross

By Anonymous - 02/03/2017 17:00 - Canada - Elora

Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 543

You deserved it 1 617

They grow up so fast these days…

By Anonymous - 11/07/2022 06:00

Today, my 5 year-old and I walked in on a girl giving her boyfriend a blow job in the washroom at the playground. Last week we found a crack pipe on the picnic table. So many conversations I wish we could have waited for… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 166

By myself - 20/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Seaside

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 460

You deserved it 31 247

omegaxen 0

Monday 12 September 2011 22:57

That blows!

Hockey_fan 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:00

Well that really sucks" That really "Dampened" your spirits That "blows" Well..we all seen it "Coming" ...I'm sorry

Comments

funnynesh 10

Friday 27 January 2012 22:29

Spermy!

chrisbceltics 6

Wednesday 22 February 2012 8:09

wow that really sucks...but its also really funny haha

ImTheAlpha 30

Wednesday 4 April 2012 22:34

Aww ****, that sucks balls. Yøu might want to come to my høuse, I have balloons to blow.

makymama 0

Thursday 3 May 2012 21:05

Oh, that's naaasty!! ????

love2killu 21

Wednesday 25 July 2012 13:13

Oh god y.... Get urself checked out

awkward_gothlady 32

Wednesday 29 August 2012 19:34

Gross!! Get tested ASAP!!

insomniac8400 13

Tuesday 9 October 2012 2:00

who the **** blows up soggy balloons they find on the ground?? even if they were actually balloons that's still retarded

melkymac101 17

Sunday 23 December 2012 5:26

No wonder they tasted weird. Oh we'll. at least I'm not pregnant.

crystalxa 35

Tuesday 24 September 2013 22:31

OH WOW! That's really interesting.. aha

texascutie10 1

Monday 18 November 2013 4:48

umm...std much!

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 257

You deserved it 5 021

Today, I found why exactly my clothes always seemed more stretched out after about a week of owning them. My mom steals and wears them when she goes clubbing. My mom is 46, twice my size, and gets out more than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 037

You deserved it 3 835

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 467

You deserved it 10 563

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 178

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman. My name is Elsa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 119

You deserved it 4 542

Today, my sister and I decided to do one of those online DNA tests just for fun. Our mom came in, saw all the stuff on the table, and lost her mind. She started bawling and apologizing. Apparently, neither one or neither of us actually belong to my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 390

You deserved it 120

Same thing different taste

TMI FML

Gross

They grow up so fast these days…

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