Miscellaneous: Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day...

By JuicyJohn - 09/09/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 379

You deserved it 53 693

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Five bucks

By DreamZ - 24/05/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 351

By Anonymous - 29/06/2009 17:55 - Canada

Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans fit. Neither do my fat jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 897

You deserved it 46 648

By oops - 11/05/2015 16:40 - United States - Lutherville Timonium

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 484

You deserved it 9 896

By Anonymous - 22/07/2016 17:19 - United States - Washington

Today, I had to deal with yet another day of people looking at my name tag and saying "You know nothing, John Snow." with a shit-eating grin, like they're the wittiest people alive. Then I had to deal with my boss telling me to lighten up, because it's "just a joke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 784

You deserved it 1 858

By Anonymous - 14/10/2009 03:25 - France

Today, I was so bored, I sewed my name into my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 578

You deserved it 13 892

By deucelututi - 31/05/2009 12:03 - United States

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 193

You deserved it 81 198

By thefoolwhorippedhispants - 20/04/2018 01:30

Today, I came home from work to realize I had a massive rip in my shorts from my crotch to my crack. I have to lean over constantly in front of dozens of people at my job. Not one person said anything, but now I know why they were chuckling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 333

You deserved it 430

By FML - 30/08/2009 14:15 - United States

Today, I had to buy another pair of "fat jeans", because my old "fat jeans" became my new "skinny jeans." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 294

You deserved it 58 971

By Tomtom - 17/11/2008 05:04 - France

Today, I put on the same jeans that I had left in a bundle in my bedroom the day before. A few hours later, my boxer shorts decided to make their spectacular reappearance trick at the bottom of my leg in the middle of one of my meetings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 089

You deserved it 11 613

By xkellybabyyx - 25/11/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 906

You deserved it 40 664

lolzRaptor 1

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:29

Nice to meet you, Juicy.

redbluegreen 40

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:33

Well, what else is your ass gonna say?

Comments

jaw709 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 17:40

So apparently everyone's wondering how this dude fit into tight-ass girl-sized shorts? Maybe he's got a collapsible pelvis and folds up like one of those Chinese paper fans. Or, perhaps he's emaciated. But, that probably wouldn't sell as well.

Cymbre9199 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 20:45

Lmao @ Juicy John. And yes it is kind of catchy haahahah =)

jook_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 1:09

Juicy John - Haha, it works!

06John09 0

Friday 11 September 2009 4:02

Hey man, if you got it, flaunt it. Sometimes a man wants to feel pretty.

X_totallysucks_X 0

Friday 11 September 2009 4:21

Wondering why there was a draft? Now you know.

equastriangirl 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 0:27

wtf how do you fit in juicy couture shorts and they are all short shorts so thier is no way you could mistake them for guys shorts

pixidust 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 0:29

my name is earl.

Myspace_fml 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 13:47

Hahaha how could you mistake suck girly shorts for guy shorts? xD

ISeeStarsBitchh 0

Wednesday 16 September 2009 2:48

Win. Hahahahaaa.

jenius81 0

Monday 19 October 2009 4:10

must have been one hell of a hangover.

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

You’re probably wondering what this website is all about. Well, it’s basically a bunch of people who had enough humor to tell you all about their shitty lives, and what it was that made their day suck a big fat one. Some are sad in funny way, som...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 13

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 511

You deserved it 84 244

The Top

Today, I found out that four years ago, my fiancé and the father of my children had sex with my younger sister twice, one of those times being in my house while our baby and I were sleeping in the next room. Couldn’t be better timing as I start chemotherapy in 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 929

You deserved it 124

Today, I wore crotchless panties to bed and my boyfriend didn't notice. It's been 10 months since we've had sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 394

Today, I know my clothing size and the clothes I buy usually fit me. Except for underwear. How come women’s panties always seem to be at least one size smaller than advertised? FML

I agree, your life sucks 675

You deserved it 146

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 655

You deserved it 6 224

Today, I started hooking up with a guy I've liked for a while. We got pretty into it and he went into my underwear, looking confused. When I asked him what was wrong, his response was: "I can't find it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 686

You deserved it 5 066

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a toaster and a fork as a wedding gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 271

You deserved it 3 433

Same thing different taste

Five bucks

Top comments

Comments