Miscellaneous: Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day...

By JuicyJohn - 09/09/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 378

You deserved it 53 692

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Same thing different taste

Five bucks

By DreamZ - 24/05/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 346

By Anonymous - 29/06/2009 17:55 - Canada

Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans fit. Neither do my fat jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 894

You deserved it 46 644

By oops - 11/05/2015 16:40 - United States - Lutherville Timonium

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 483

You deserved it 9 895

By Anonymous - 22/07/2016 17:19 - United States - Washington

Today, I had to deal with yet another day of people looking at my name tag and saying "You know nothing, John Snow." with a shit-eating grin, like they're the wittiest people alive. Then I had to deal with my boss telling me to lighten up, because it's "just a joke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 783

You deserved it 1 857

By Anonymous - 14/10/2009 03:25 - France

Today, I was so bored, I sewed my name into my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 574

You deserved it 13 889

By deucelututi - 31/05/2009 12:03 - United States

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 192

You deserved it 81 197

By FML - 30/08/2009 14:15 - United States

Today, I had to buy another pair of 'fat jeans', because my old 'fat jeans' became my new 'skinny jeans'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 292

You deserved it 58 969

By thefoolwhorippedhispants - 20/04/2018 01:30

Today, I came home from work to realize I had a massive rip in my shorts from my crotch to my crack. I have to lean over constantly in front of dozens of people at my job. Not one person said anything, but now I know why they were chuckling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 330

You deserved it 430

By Tomtom - 17/11/2008 05:04 - France

Today, I put on the same jeans that I had left in a bundle in my bedroom the day before. A few hours later, my boxer shorts decided to make their spectacular reappearance trick at the bottom of my leg in the middle of one of my meetings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 089

You deserved it 11 612

By xkellybabyyx - 25/11/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 906

You deserved it 40 664

lolzRaptor 1

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:29

Nice to meet you, Juicy.

redbluegreen 40

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:33

Well, what else is your ass gonna say?

Comments

VampiressMiharu 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 1:12

Hello, John. You really have an awkward way of introducing yourself to the internet.

joy_nash 7

Thursday 10 September 2009 1:14

LOL duuude, xD I'd have laughed so hard

themachinist 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 1:21

that'll teach you to wear your girlfriend's clothes. douchebag.

333chiyoko333 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:27

if that doesnt make you look gay I dont know what does. sorry.

dave202 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:31

This is dumb. Shorts that says Juicy on them are like 5 inches long and pink, so you definitely would have noticed, unless thats what you usually wear, but then I don't think you would care that your shorts say juicy

crzygrl90218 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 2:48

ROFL haha I am soooi sorry

xSceneSceneBabyx 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 4:05

hey, if you ever decide to become a male stripper, at least you know your nickname!

poopymonsters 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 6:14

juicy= diarrhea after doing a backflip over a braindead camel in the parking lot of an out of business carls jr. in indonesia!

Ultraviolet_fml 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 7:02

LMAOOOOO

BalenciagaBetch9 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 7:31

juicy john. its kind of catchy... i like it.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Love Money Racism Harassment My ex Work Accident Embarrassing Religion AITA Am I overreacting? Health Relatable Gifts Annoying LGBTQIA+ Inappropriate Education Teachers Animals Dogs Relationship advice Cute Cats Transportation Cars Friends Scams

The Top

Today, I was playing Spikeball with some friends when the ball got lost and went rolling towards a pond. As I sprinted to grab it before it fell in the water, my shoe came off, causing me to trip and faceplant into the mud. I then watched as the ball rolled into the pond. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 143

Today, a realtor came to take a look at my house. I had worked all morning to make it look lovely. When they took pictures, I explained a number of ways I could change things so everything would look as good as possible. After the house tour, they told me it should be bulldozed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 880

You deserved it 1 069

The Top

Today, I saw a news story about how wearing flip-flops is dangerous. I scoffed at the ridiculous study and went about my business. Three hours later I accidentally ripped off my toenail. While wearing flip-flops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 012

You deserved it 22 906

Today, I politely complimented a stranger's excellent posture. She responded by saying "I have a metal rod in my back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 582

You deserved it 7 200

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 181

You deserved it 228

Today, I learned what a nail gun shooting my leg feels like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 246

You deserved it 11 971

Today, I got in a hotel elevator. There was a kid in there also. He got off on the 3rd floor. As he was stepping from the elevator, he decided to press every single button. It's a 35 floor hotel. My room is on the 32nd floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 210

You deserved it 4 330

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 938

You deserved it 3 106

Same thing different taste

Five bucks

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