Miscellaneous: Today, I sat on the toilet and fell off as the broken toilet...

By Sack - 10/11/2011 11:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I sat on the toilet and fell off as the broken toilet seat slid off. As I fell, I grabbed the light cord in an effort to stop myself, and pulled it out of the ceiling. Now I can't use the toilet, and have to shower in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 437

You deserved it 6 073

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Same thing different taste

By TheKingDavis - 14/02/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 107

You deserved it 3 196

By Anonymous - 17/03/2011 18:57 - United States

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 014

You deserved it 7 038

Check before you wreck

By Kailey - 28/10/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, I was moving into my new house. While trying to turn on the light in the bedroom, I realized I couldn't reach the string on the fan. I got a chair, climbed up, reached over, and fell badly. While writhing in agony on the floor, I looked over to see a light switch on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 316

You deserved it 33 977

By soccercrazed1520 - 13/01/2010 21:40 - France

Today, I was taking a warm shower when someone in my house flushed the toilet, making the shower extremely hot. In my rush to get out so I wouldn't get burned, I slipped and knocked a tooth out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 302

You deserved it 4 390

By pooplife - 30/11/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 259

You deserved it 4 968

By xo007 - 04/11/2009 17:40 - United States

Today, as I stepped into the shower, I slipped and fell over the edge of the tub, pulling the shower curtain down with me. I called my roommate to help me up as I put on a towel over me. But before she could help me up, she grabbed her phone to take a picture. The picture became a mass text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 778

You deserved it 3 739

What the **** was that?

By Hatty - 14/03/2010 10:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 731

You deserved it 23 691

By SeatofIgnorance - 29/08/2017 04:30

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 682

You deserved it 4 988

Headshot

By home owner - 20/08/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower for the first time in my new apartment. The shower head broke off the wall and slammed onto my head, while spraying water everywhere. I tried to stop the water, but only stopped the cold and got burnt by the hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 740

You deserved it 3 363

By BrownDump - 14/05/2011 10:43 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 327

You deserved it 14 193

Mr_Alarm 12

Thursday 10 November 2011 16:11

That sounds like a shi- *gets shot*

Lemuel_fml 5

Thursday 10 November 2011 16:12

I wonder how the toilet seat broke in the first place...

Comments

darkmis1 17

Thursday 10 November 2011 21:12

If it's your place, shouldn't you have known that your toilet seat was broken?

SpideyRules 9

Thursday 10 November 2011 21:13

The 1800's called. They want their bathroom back...

mrbuddy 0

Thursday 10 November 2011 21:28

Not that hard to fix that

KJON 0

Thursday 10 November 2011 22:36

Who has a pull string in their bathroom?

janro72 10

Thursday 10 November 2011 22:59

are you fat or something?

FMLAndAllOfYours 0

Thursday 10 November 2011 23:05

Well hey, worse things could've happened! Like....ummm...ya know...hmm.. well I'm sure there's SOMETHING!

dogpup4 23

Thursday 10 November 2011 23:27

Piss in shower and use a torch.

leadman1989 15

Thursday 10 November 2011 23:27

Get a lamp and a bear... problem solved NO!!! don't put them in the shower with you!!!

grunt656 0

Friday 11 November 2011 2:50

Solution: Man up, shower in the dark, and piss in the shower. CRISIS AVOIDED

DaveMatthewsBand 4

Friday 11 November 2011 4:41

I feel so bad for you. :( that really sucks. I've had to get ready in the dark too before cuz my lightbulb went out and I couldn't find anymore.

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The Top

Today, I bought my fiancée a dress for her birthday. She accused me of saying she was fat, because I bought it in medium rather than small. After trying on the dress, she's now not only mad at me for buying it, but also because the dress fits perfectly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 405

You deserved it 4 549

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 197

You deserved it 9 151

The Top

Today, my ex called to ask me to pick up our kids, because she'd scored a hot date and didn't have time, and then didn't answered the phone over the next two hours. I live 80 miles away and have no idea what school they go to, since they moved to a new city. How the fuck did the judge give her full custody? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 296

You deserved it 202

Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 266

You deserved it 421

Today, a co-worker passed me a note with information about one of our cute, new co-workers I was interested in. Her report? Simple: "Lesbian. Try again. They're EVERYWHERE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 165

You deserved it 3 676

Today, I got high-fived in the face by a jellyfish. Twice. #FML @KillingerExp

I agree, your life sucks 1 971

You deserved it 259

Today, despite giving my sister a place to stay while she's in town for a funeral, she demanded I give a bedroom to her son to have to himself, because, "How am I supposed to have 'sexy time' with my husband with him in the room?" Everyone's sharing rooms, and no one's getting sexy time as someone literally died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 112

Today, after the church service was over, my two year-old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang "Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 426

You deserved it 9 364

Same thing different taste

Check before you wreck

What the **** was that?

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