Health: Today, I shat out a staple. FML

By wtf - 09/06/2011 15:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 618

You deserved it 17 977

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Same thing different taste

By mimi - 27/09/2011 02:51 - United States

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 682

You deserved it 35 753

By 41k312 - 01/11/2016 05:03

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 745

You deserved it 3 630

By leprechaun23 - 23/04/2012 04:21 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 296

You deserved it 4 317

By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 274

You deserved it 49 089

By SenorPoopypants - 08/01/2017 19:23

Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 667

You deserved it 992

By sadface - 04/01/2010 06:43 - Australia

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 488

You deserved it 7 421

Self-own

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 08:01

Today, out of nowhere, I started violently choking on my own saliva and shat myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 052

You deserved it 136

Jeremy?

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 22:00

Today, I shat myself in the middle of Walmart. It dripped out the bottom of my pants till i made it to the restroom, which was on the other side of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 125

You deserved it 266

Autopilot

By TuteBananaCupcake - 29/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I used the last of the toilet paper to blow my nose while taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 571

By Maddie - 22/03/2011 15:39

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 492

You deserved it 12 939

rockerbaby3192 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 18:45

why did you eat one

BShady96 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 19:31

this fml was so short i had trouble opening it on my iphone -.-

Comments

iEatGuppies 0

Friday 24 June 2011 6:15

WOAH HOW DID THAT GET THERe?

RoQRt 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 11:31

What...the.........hell?

keeks46 12

Tuesday 30 August 2011 18:57

Mustve been a pretty shitty day for you

BritLass 15

Tuesday 13 September 2011 19:44

How the Hell did you manage to eat it in the first place? :S

YtotsDI 0

Friday 7 October 2011 16:25

well... what made you do that?

cherrycokelove 8

Sunday 9 October 2011 23:25

serves u rite for eating the staple

hurrican_fml 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 8:34

Well maybe he was hungry

alexh15 13

Tuesday 29 November 2011 22:22

Well, that is a staple food in some places...

kaycee1996 5

Saturday 31 December 2011 12:47

YDI for eating staples. That's just weird :S

iluvmusic8128 0

Saturday 18 February 2012 15:28

did u eat one or something?

Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Embarrassing Awkward Health Love Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic

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Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 315

You deserved it 2 040

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

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You deserved it 7 856

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Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 2 077

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past six months. I have a final tomorrow and have been busy crying, so guess I'll just have to fail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 223

Today, I went in for an audition. Since my wrist had been in a brace all week, I felt I would be fine without it for one day because I didn't want it to be a distraction. I tripped in the middle of the dance routine and crashed on top of my injured wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 515

You deserved it 4 710

Today, I accidentally sent a nude to my girlfriend's father. He screenshotted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 410

You deserved it 3 010

Today, I decided to propose to my girlfriend on the Charles Bridge in Prague. A little boy thought it would be fun to chase a flock of pigeons towards me. I freaked out and dropped the 2 carat diamond ring. Into the river. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 752

You deserved it 10 984

Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 740

You deserved it 2 432

Same thing different taste

Self-own

Jeremy?

Autopilot

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