By juliette - 08/10/2012 05:39 - United States - Tucson

Spicy
Today, I surprised my boyfriend with a bag containing condoms and sexy lingerie. He looks into it and says, "I hope you kept the receipt." FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 542
You deserved it 4 503

Same thing different taste

Top comments

The sexy lingerie you should keep. The asshole boyfriend...not so much.

Comments

perdix 29

We don't know what's happened in the past, but when a girl suddenly starts supplying condoms, she's saying, "I've recently boned someone sketchy, or I think you may have." Either (ee) way, it's not a good sign.

McNerdyNerd 8

I heard sometimes guys like when the girl takes initiative and offers things like that...shows they want it too? I heard it from guys but maybe they're just crazy.

perdix 29

On one of the early dates, yeah, that can be hot, but if you've been going at it bareback for a while, the sudden introduction of condoms can set off the alarm bells.

Where do you get the information that they don't usually use condoms? Also if that were true, maybe she has taken a break from using the pill and doesn't want to risk pregnancy, we don't know the circumstances...

McNerdyNerd 8

Ah yes....that would make things odd I guess haha

ruthlessmofo 0

You sound like a freak op. I like freaks.

ElishaisSexy2016 9

I would have said "why does it matter? I'm about to pleasure you." :)

His loss not yours. You should have said "Your dick is too small for these condoms anyway" Haha

RedPillSucks 31

Maybe he was planning on keeping his virginity for a while? *scurries back to corner to watch "40 year old virgin" with "Forever alone" bumper sticker on back*

skulltorn 8

Find someone else to use it with!

ViviMage 39

Ya realize you can't return those for health reasons

I once had a boyfriend who suddenly began to turn down sex. After 3 months of my trying and his constant refusals, he dumped me. He's gay now. But I'm engaged! :D dump this guy, you deserve to feel appreciated honey.

RedPillSucks 31

You didn't say how old you were when that happens, but not everyone who refuses sex is gay.

What he's trying to tell you is he has a boyfriend.