Love: Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask...

By Anonymous - 29/11/2014 16:28 - United States - Portland

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 421

You deserved it 5 754

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Same thing different taste

By Marou - 25/12/2008 01:54 - France

Today, I sent a text message to a guy I like, saying, "Dear Santa, I want to fall in love." He replied: "Wait for next Christmas..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 347

You deserved it 11 116

By perenoel - 03/12/2011 16:24 - France

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 015

You deserved it 6 152

Nice dude

By ThroatSlasher - 17/08/2015 19:20 - United Kingdom - Grimsby

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 997

You deserved it 2 457

By Brunette, small breasts - 24/07/2016 18:51 - Romania - Campina

Today, I decided to finally talk to my crush. I said, "Hello" to which he replied, "First, dye your hair blonde and grow some boobs, then we can talk business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 034

You deserved it 1 411

By JG - 10/05/2012 11:48 - United States - Melbourne

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 411

You deserved it 4 207

By Anonymous - 28/11/2009 22:23 - United States

Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 125

You deserved it 49 644

Life ain't a movie, son

By Effwmn - 20/12/2022 09:00

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams, the girl I've loved for 3 years. I went to her desk and surprised her with roses, chocolates, and played “All I Want for Christmas is You.” She said no. On top of that, she ate all the chocolates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 1 265

By Anonymous - 26/01/2014 00:33 - United States - Durham

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 942

You deserved it 52 946

By TheAngryBird - 28/06/2012 04:51 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 413

You deserved it 2 716

By C45 - 25/12/2009 20:27 - Canada

Today, from my girlfriend of five years, I got my clothes back, my engagment ring and a card that says, "Merry Christmas! It's me not you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 590

You deserved it 2 592

MidnightRain3 16

Saturday 29 November 2014 21:36

Ouch. Lol

hannah_cheers 30

Saturday 29 November 2014 21:37

If he cares more about looks than personality, he isn't worth it, OP. Find someone who will find you beautiful no matter what.

Comments

RuthDaGreatest 6

Sunday 30 November 2014 21:15

Wasn't expecting him to say that.....that must of hurt

fantasyworld 37

Monday 1 December 2014 1:37

He deserves a lump of coal.

Zeishah 26

Monday 1 December 2014 3:01

Aw you're cute op! Next time find someone who appreciates that bout you.

blehh818 6

Monday 1 December 2014 4:52

gold star babe you tried

Hash13 13

Monday 1 December 2014 5:21

Just laugh it off. He may come bk appreciatin your humor. Or u just dodge a bullet.

JKPwnage 27

Monday 1 December 2014 5:37

BURN

Parvati48 15

Monday 1 December 2014 6:21

Ouch, sorry OP. He isn't worth your time and effort though. :/

sylverdrag_fml 9

Monday 1 December 2014 15:53

Well, sorry, I am the last one in stock.

jaydemonkey 6

Tuesday 2 December 2014 1:58

What an asshole

pitapizzaparty 18

Tuesday 2 December 2014 8:10

He sounds thirsty . I would say give him a water bottle for christmas but i think he needs some coal

Keywords

Cheating Love Work Relatable Money Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, I came home early from business trip to Paris, where I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of two years out and propose to her. I sneaked into our house as a surprise and… she was having sex with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 490

You deserved it 4 181

Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 315

You deserved it 2 040

The Top

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to sneak out. As I was climbing out of my 3rd floor window, he got a text and moved the ladder. Now I'm in the hospital with two broken ribs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 595

You deserved it 37 405

Today, an hour into a family road trip, my mother informed me that she didn't put my suitcase in the car because it "didn't fit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 865

You deserved it 2 078

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 707

You deserved it 2 203

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 194

You deserved it 5 264

Today, I discovered that my cat will not use a litter box if it has a lid. How did I discover this? The two weeks of crystallized cat pee coating the floor under my 19th century grand piano. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 341

Today, my sister smashed a cup on my head because I told her she couldn't borrow one of my necklaces since she lost one and stole another. I was grounded for "antagonizing" her into doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 397

You deserved it 171

Same thing different taste

Nice dude

Life ain't a movie, son

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