Love: Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask...

By Anonymous - 29/11/2014 16:28 - United States - Portland

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 419

You deserved it 5 754

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Same thing different taste

By Marou - 25/12/2008 01:54 - France

Today, I sent a text message to a guy I like, saying, "Dear Santa, I want to fall in love." He replied: "Wait for next Christmas..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 346

You deserved it 11 114

By perenoel - 03/12/2011 16:24 - France

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 010

You deserved it 6 151

Nice dude

By ThroatSlasher - 17/08/2015 19:20 - United Kingdom - Grimsby

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 995

You deserved it 2 457

By Brunette, small breasts - 24/07/2016 18:51 - Romania - Campina

Today, I decided to finally talk to my crush. I said, "Hello" to which he replied, "First, dye your hair blonde and grow some boobs, then we can talk business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 033

You deserved it 1 411

By JG - 10/05/2012 11:48 - United States - Melbourne

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 406

You deserved it 4 207

By Anonymous - 28/11/2009 22:23 - United States

Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 125

You deserved it 49 642

Life ain't a movie, son

By Effwmn - 20/12/2022 09:00

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams, the girl I've loved for 3 years. I went to her desk and surprised her with roses, chocolates, and played “All I Want for Christmas is You.” She said no. On top of that, she ate all the chocolates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 1 261

By Anonymous - 26/01/2014 00:33 - United States - Durham

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 941

You deserved it 52 943

By TheAngryBird - 28/06/2012 04:51 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 413

You deserved it 2 715

By C45 - 25/12/2009 20:27 - Canada

Today, from my girlfriend of five years, I got my clothes back, my engagment ring and a card that says, "Merry Christmas! It's me not you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 588

You deserved it 2 590

MidnightRain3 16

Saturday 29 November 2014 21:36

Ouch. Lol

hannah_cheers 30

Saturday 29 November 2014 21:37

If he cares more about looks than personality, he isn't worth it, OP. Find someone who will find you beautiful no matter what.

Comments

RuthDaGreatest 6

Sunday 30 November 2014 21:15

Wasn't expecting him to say that.....that must of hurt

fantasyworld 37

Monday 1 December 2014 1:37

He deserves a lump of coal.

Zeishah 26

Monday 1 December 2014 3:01

Aw you're cute op! Next time find someone who appreciates that bout you.

blehh818 6

Monday 1 December 2014 4:52

gold star babe you tried

Hash13 13

Monday 1 December 2014 5:21

Just laugh it off. He may come bk appreciatin your humor. Or u just dodge a bullet.

JKPwnage 27

Monday 1 December 2014 5:37

BURN

Parvati48 15

Monday 1 December 2014 6:21

Ouch, sorry OP. He isn't worth your time and effort though. :/

sylverdrag_fml 9

Monday 1 December 2014 15:53

Well, sorry, I am the last one in stock.

jaydemonkey 6

Tuesday 2 December 2014 1:58

What an asshole

pitapizzaparty 18

Tuesday 2 December 2014 8:10

He sounds thirsty . I would say give him a water bottle for christmas but i think he needs some coal

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Love Money Racism Harassment My ex Work Accident Embarrassing Religion AITA Am I overreacting? Health Relatable Gifts Annoying LGBTQIA+ Inappropriate Education Teachers Animals Dogs Relationship advice Cute Cats Transportation Cars Friends Scams

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and were I getting it on in his bedroom where he had all of his anime models on display. I accidentally knocked over one of his models and it fell on to the floor. He got angry and kicked me out. Apparently, making his models look good was more important than us making love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 645

You deserved it 13 331

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 867

You deserved it 8 977

The Top

Today, I was entertaining people during an extra curricular school function in order to help "brighten people's spirits in their time of need." After it was all over, I found out that my phone had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 738

You deserved it 3 101

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 653

You deserved it 6 224

Today, my sisters took me to a gay bar to celebrate my birthday. All was going well, until the drag queens demanded anyone with a birthday on stage. My sisters forced me to go. Turns out, it was for a twerking contest. I can't dance and have social anxiety. When I got off the stage, I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 180

You deserved it 178

Today, my boss confessed to me that she doesn't know how to change the staples in the staplers at work, so she just switches them when they run out. We work at an office supply store. She makes six figures. I make $10 an hour. And she just got awarded a trip to Aruba for doing a "great job". FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 458

You deserved it 3 431

Today, my brother finally paid me the $60 he owed me. I later found out that he'd stolen those $60 from my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 106

You deserved it 3 868

Today, I spent my first night with my English boyfriend. I'm French, and when we woke up, I said in my most sexy voice, "Oh, I'm so dirty!" It's only when he left that I finally understood the look on his face; I wanted to have a glass of water. I was thirsty, not dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 847

You deserved it 8 001

Same thing different taste

Nice dude

Life ain't a movie, son

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