Miscellaneous: Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have...

By jkbeynon - 03/03/2013 04:18 - United States - Canyon Country

Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 811

You deserved it 3 627

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Tubular Bells starts playing…

By so scared - 08/02/2014 17:13 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon, after I'd explained to her how scared I was of The Exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 689

You deserved it 6 206

"Tubular Bells" by Mike Oldfield starts playing…

By Sodapop40 - 21/06/2020 05:05

Today, my mom admitted to me that, when I was a baby, my grandmother kidnapped me and took me to the priest to perform an exorcism, because she swore I was the "spawn of Satan." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 578

You deserved it 128

By anonymous - 06/07/2011 15:21 - United States

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 509

You deserved it 3 714

Goodbye Rémy…

By Tough guy - 04/09/2021 23:00

Today, I was laying in bed when my sister came running in, scared. I took my bat and went into the kitchen where the suspicious noise was coming from. It was a rat, right in the middle of the floor. I jumped on the counter and shrieked, just as my girlfriend walked in, who then actually dealt with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 831

Rats!

By I’m screwed - 08/12/2018 15:30

Today, we’ve had a rat problem in our house for a few weeks. Recently I hid a bottle of booze in my room so my parents wouldn’t see it. But my parents saw a rat in my room and tore the whole thing apart to find it, eventually finding my bottle instead. I was literally ratted out by a rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 2 761

Ratatouille

By Anonymous - 16/10/2020 08:02

Today, after my house almost got broken into last week, when I heard some noises in the kitchen I went to investigate. I saw a huge rat run across my floor, and nearly peed myself thinking it was an intruder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 172

Possession

By Anonymous - 10/07/2023 18:00

Today, my mom wants me to get an exorcism because piercings, tattoos, my own car, my own career, moving out of her house, and wanting zero contact with her from now on are "sure signs of demonic possession", maybe even the influence of Lucifer himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 137

SATAN!

By Anonymous - 08/12/2021 02:01

Today, my nana tried to drown my pet rat because it's white with red eyes, and red eyes mean it’s Satan in disguise, and yet my mom still refuses to admit she needs to be in a nursing home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 053

You deserved it 123

By Anonymous - 13/01/2016 07:46 - Netherlands - Overveen

Today, I dreamed a rat crawled up from the toilet and attacked me. Now I'm afraid to even enter the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 207

You deserved it 3 781

By fuck my goddamn life - 15/02/2014 20:51 - United States

Today, I'm stuck in a hotel with my psychotic mom, all because she swore there were "demonic" noises coming from our oven. Yeah, our oven is totally possessed, you idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 561

You deserved it 4 839

Lucia_Malpense 14

Sunday 3 March 2013 9:14

How ridiculous. Everyone knows that the Devil lives in the basement.

HaneenDixon 16

Sunday 3 March 2013 9:19

Oh man! I can't believe your mom ratted out the devils hiding spot!

Comments

SWC_Penguin 17

Sunday 3 March 2013 14:35

I also live my life based on what I see in movies and it's always been OMG, VELOCIRAPTORS! Run!

SomeRandomGuy15 18

Sunday 3 March 2013 15:28

I don't really see an FML here... "My mom has a sense of humor, FML"

skyeyez9 24

Sunday 3 March 2013 15:44

I would be terrified if Wild rats lived in my house. They are mean and will eat your face in your sleep and bite you. Plus the diseases could they have. They are alot meaner vs your domesticated pet you you have from the pet store. Those are gentle and loveable. But even then, I'd trap them humanely and release them vs kill.

420Zombie 17

Sunday 3 March 2013 18:40

releasing a domesticated animal into the wild most often results in said animals death anyways.

lochiamochia 25

Monday 4 March 2013 5:33

The rats living in our attic aren't mean at all. They are actually quite adorable creatures except for the fact that they leave droppings all over the house, eat all our food, chew on our electric cords, and host rat orgies from 1am till 9 am in the morning. Otherwise, I would never feel the need to banish them from the house. If only they were as quiet as the hobo living in the basement.... *Sigh* A week ago, even he couldn't stand their ruckus that he moved into the neighbor's shed one block down the street.

strayaway 12

Sunday 3 March 2013 15:48

Lmao That's funny, sorry OP at least she didn't look for a priest to exorcise you

heyhooker 11

Sunday 3 March 2013 16:08

Awesome!!!

lashes_to_ashes 14

Sunday 3 March 2013 16:11

Haahahaha your mum is funny

ZombieSazza 34

Sunday 3 March 2013 16:37

... Yeah I'd go ahead and just book the exterminator using her card, if she wasn't to be stupid just let her, at least you'll actually get something done about it.