Kids: Today, I tried to give a four-year-old I was working with a high-five... - FML

By band13geek - 15/12/2016 01:59

Today, I tried to give a four-year-old I was working with a high-five for finishing his math worksheet. He high-fived me with the pencil. And I don't mean the eraser side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 226

You deserved it 634

band13geek tells us more.

band13geek 16

Friday 23 December 2016 20:48

OP here. The child was holding the pencil when I asked for the high five and *might* have not realized what he had done, but he isn't one to follow the rules, which I enforce more so than some of the other teachers, so he could have done it on purpose. I'm not really sure. All I know is that it hurt! But at least he should know now to not stab people.

St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

band13geek 16

Friday 23 December 2016 20:40

He was just holding it when I asked for the high five. I don't know if he forgot to put it down or if he just felt like stabbing me (which would make sense since he doesn't like me...)

TwinkleToes7 15

Tuesday 20 December 2016 5:06

This is a great pointer to avoid in the future!

Comments

RagingDeathFTW 1

Saturday 8 April 2017 0:42

I sat on a pencil once in second grade, in the middle of class. This is a true story

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Friends Cute Work Relatable Miscellaneous Family Dogs Introverts Gamers Money Homeowners Love Video games Dating Cheating Parents Toxic Food Health Annoying Drugs Mental health Sex Stressed out Social Media Clothes Animals Geek

The Top

Today, I found out I got HIV. I’ve used condoms with all my Tinder hookups and never shared needles or anything with anyone. I was supposed to have a Tinder date tonight. Guess I’ll just be single forever then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 272

Today, in the changing room at my gym, you'd never see my D. I'm very strategic and my towel or shirt will always block it. Today there was a dad-bod walking nude to the mirror without a towel. I saw his. There was bush of hair surrounding a pale pink little acorn. How does he have the confidence? How is he not shy? FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 469

The Top

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 664

You deserved it 61 254

Today, after I lost $5000 in crypto yesterday, I'm now down about $150k total since the start of the year. I just deployed more and bought $FML to make up for the losses. Hopefully it’ll happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 909

Today, I told my man I was feeling a lack of emotional closeness and dialogue in our relationship. I'd hoped for a comeback like, "So what do you need in order to change that?" Or even, "Aw, come here, let's cuddle!" Instead, I got a simple, "I don't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 367

Today, I decided to start working out because my friends said I'm scrawny and weak. I bought an expensive giant container of protein powder to take before during work outs. I wasn't strong enough to open the lid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 82

Today, my boyfriend asked me to go to a car show. I told him to hold on, I had to ask my mom. I quietly asked her to say no for me. She said "Sure!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 771

You deserved it 37 167

Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three Percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 811

You deserved it 3 957