Love: Today, I tried to pick up two girls by asking them what time... - FML

By SweeT - 25/10/2008 16:55

Today, I tried to pick up two girls by asking them what time it was. They burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 935

You deserved it 55 127

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/03/2013 07:52 - United States

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 058

You deserved it 9 239

A cashier's life

By amy - 16/10/2013 21:52 - United States - Wellesley Hills

Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 827

You deserved it 3 983

By Anonymous - 26/06/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 522

You deserved it 51 620

No joke

By SilverZephyr - 16/01/2015 12:49 - United States - Marion

Today, I asked out a girl that I've liked for a while. She thought I was joking and laughed, saying, "No. Have you met yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 673

You deserved it 3 488

By aere - 27/01/2009 12:24 - United States

Today, three girls introduced themselves to me. I had met all of them before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 129

You deserved it 2 861

By annonymous - 18/06/2012 01:57 - United States

Today, my dad approached two girls at a store and told them I'd crashed into their car. They didn't find it funny either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 353

You deserved it 2 043

Who's that weird guy?

By Anonymous - 27/12/2020 10:59

Today, I was trying to get a girl's attention, because I had a question. I shouted her name. No answer. I shouted again but louder. It wasn't her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 310

You deserved it 747

By Anonymous - 31/05/2009 13:04 - United States

Today, I asked out one of the girls that hangs out in my group of friends (the same group I have been hanging out for three years). She stared at me for a couple of seconds, then said, "Who the hell are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 033

You deserved it 4 901

Check these out

By Groom - 30/11/2008 10:51 - France

Today, I had an important interview. On the way there, I stopped in front of a car window to look at my reflection, checking I didn't have salad stuck between my teeth. Having pulled several faces, I realised that there were two girls inside the car, cracking up with laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 092

You deserved it 12 386

Oh the times, they are a-changin'

By toelie - 06/11/2017 22:00

Today, as two of my students walked into my classroom, I said, "Hi, ladies". One of them screamed at me: "Did you just assume my gender?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 130

You deserved it 607

Next

Top comments

pzzzz 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 14:43

so you went up to two girls and said "What time is it?" and they burst out laughing? thats a weird reaction, you should have been like "Im not trying to hit on you ***** i just need to know what time it is" and walk away so they feel bad too

chinitabonita 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 20:45

were you wearing a watch?

Comments

lexilou1824 6

Thursday 28 July 2011 1:27

them are some very old lines

Black_Letter 19

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:33

YDI for using lame ass pick-up lines

freddykrueger56 2

Tuesday 1 November 2011 21:00

Sierra Hotel Alpha Whiskey Golf

SPAZATTACK216 7

Thursday 24 November 2011 17:54

HAHAHAHAHA that's hilarious. I would laugh too.

poleybear 3

Monday 13 February 2012 2:18

Story of my life bro!

Ajwc101 24

Monday 18 June 2012 1:54

cant stop laughing

DarthVader77 9

Sunday 16 December 2012 16:33

Just one queston: did you actually find out what time it was? ;). Man, keep on practicing and remember: to find a princess we need to kiss plenty of frogs :)

KyraJFoxx 14

Wednesday 17 April 2013 17:33

It's funny because this happened to me and my sister a few years back. Only when he asked us what time it was we started laughing and kind of looked at him like "really now..." because he was in a car..drove up and down the street past us like 3x (we were walking home) than eventually he asked that all while holding a phone. Would be awkward if it was OP lol but highly doubt that

yukiokashi 12

Saturday 22 June 2013 18:15

that pickup line is so outdated...

cwl727 32

Saturday 15 March 2014 18:52

That is bad.

2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Awkward Love Friends Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Intimacy Sex Am I overreacting? Poopoo peepee Management Frustration Capitalism Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Mental health Health

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 156

Today, I have been getting calls from a weird kid from my school asking for nudes. I asked how he got my number, then found out that my friends put my number on a pole at school that says, "Call Wendy for a good time, she has nice tits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 746

You deserved it 3 568

The Top

Today, being the clean freak that I am, I bought an expensive pair of 'mop socks'. As I walked upstairs to show everyone, I slipped on the corner of the bottom step and landed on my face, breaking my toe in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 323

You deserved it 5 100

Today, I learnt that eating McDonald's, Twisties, chocolate, and popcorn, then regretting it and going to the gym is a bad idea. I discovered how far vomit, on a moving treadmill, can be thrown across a room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 565

You deserved it 48 213

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 826

You deserved it 3 714

Today, my brother is refusing a life-saving blood transfusion, just in case the blood happens to be deliberately contaminated with a disease by the government to kill him, for knowing aliens secretly made Rishi Sunak Prime Minister. Yes, he’s off his meds again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 149

Today, I realized two things: how much time I've spent waiting between lectures, and just how bad my love life is. I found out that I get incredibly jealous when somebody sits on my favourite bench in the centre of the campus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 231

You deserved it 1 142

Today, I came home to find out my stay-at-home neighbor built his kids an awesome treehouse deck two stories up in the air. Three feet from my house. Directly adjacent to my second-floor bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 631

You deserved it 912