Health: Today, I've been recovering for a week from my medically needed...

By T3kM4n - 20/09/2016 06:08 - United States - Spokane

Today, I've been recovering for a week from my medically needed circumcision. I'm 30, and they advise you wear essentially a jock strap for the first week to help. It wasn't too bad until I went to take the thing off and it caught a stitch on my manhood. That's the most unique pain ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 918

You deserved it 1 247

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Same thing different taste

By Bobby M - 16/05/2011 16:33 - Ireland

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 525

You deserved it 10 688

Damper

By bleh - 23/11/2009 22:29 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were fooling around when his foreskin ripped and bled all over the place. After a trip to the emergency room, the doctor told us no sex for six weeks to let it heal. We're getting married and going on our honeymoon in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 485

You deserved it 6 829

So painful

By Anonymous - 30/01/2020 03:00

Today, my sister caught me bent over trying to trim my pubic hairs. She took a photo of my spread ass as a joke and scared me so bad, I cut my clitoris. Currently in hospital hopped up on the really good morphine for the excruciating pain. Oh, and the stitches, God, I can't forget the stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 567

You deserved it 439

Newbie

By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 18:18 - Singapore

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 617

You deserved it 7 746

By pain - 01/11/2011 14:52 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 176

You deserved it 39 871

The chop

By Anonymous - 08/11/2021 05:01

Today, I got a serious infection following a medically necessary circumcision, and my doctor told me they will probably have to remove even more of the skin where the infection is particularly aggressive. My knob is gonna look like Freddy Krueger's face on a bad day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 702

You deserved it 148

By moerae - 03/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was fooling around with my new girlfriend. I guess she'd never been with an uncircumcised man before, because before I knew it I had a frenulum tear and had to go to the ER. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 915

You deserved it 636

Thorn in my side

By CantPublish - 15/01/2012 03:07 - United States

Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 088

You deserved it 4 994

I can feel this FML

By Anonymous - 06/10/2021 14:00

Today, I just got home from hospital after delivering an order of razor wire. One of the razors split my trousers and my sack open, my bollock was visibly hanging out of the giant slit in my sack and I had to go get it stitched shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 112

By nickthetank - 31/12/2011 09:21 - Canada

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 976

You deserved it 12 243

rebeccabyram 15

Tuesday 20 September 2016 18:39

Well that gives new meaning to the term 'yanking it'!!

airdude25 18

Tuesday 20 September 2016 18:35

Oh my god! I could only imagine... I'm so sorry OP!

Comments

TheHcwalker 20

Tuesday 20 September 2016 22:21

Take an ice bath

aphil017 6

Tuesday 20 September 2016 23:15

Oh that sounds terrible! So glad that I do not have to go through something like that, or hope I never have to!

SteveDudleyUK 10

Wednesday 21 September 2016 0:56

Even a couple of cowboys would be wary of red fourskins.

captainsmegma 12

Wednesday 21 September 2016 2:36

You need to sit back and relax with a bowl of cheetos and watch some ****.

justinb97 16

Wednesday 21 September 2016 4:22

Ouch. I instinctually curled up into fetal position just from reading this

ZombieGuyCXV 14

Wednesday 21 September 2016 4:25

When I was little, I wore a pair of swim trunks and they got stuck to some skin on my testes... Upon going to the bathroom, I had to peel them off

lindseyj17 22

Wednesday 21 September 2016 5:20

I'm a girl and even I cringed when reading this.

Grissman3000 10

Wednesday 21 September 2016 6:47

I feel like unique is just not the world for this circumstance..

EEK_the_cat 3

Wednesday 21 September 2016 9:30

Just wait until you get your first erection during your sleep or something...Now THAT will pull every stitch. I'm spreaking from personal experience. But it's all worth it in the end, trust me :)

T3kM4n 10

Wednesday 21 September 2016 15:58

Haven't had a full one yet, but I wake up 2 or 3 times a night with partials and those hurt enough. And hopefully it's enough pain that my body realizes not to go full mast :-)