Intimacy: Today, I've found out that since beginning my new heavy workout... - FML

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By Dooh - 17/01/2012 23:12 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I've found out that since beginning my new heavy workout regime, my testosterone levels have gone through the roof, making me constantly horny. My girlfriend lives on another continent. The reason I'm working out so hard? To impress her when I see her next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 115

You deserved it 5 027

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Jaded

By not as jacked - 30/04/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I've been an avid gym-goer since I was in high school. A year ago I convinced my girlfriend to start going to the gym with me and she had been sticking to it since. She has now has left me for a full-on fitness model she met there. He helped her start an online store, which is doing well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 139

Health kick

By Anonymous - 05/02/2022 00:01

Spicy

Today, after my wife set a new rule to improve my health, one sex session for every three visits to the gym, which has greatly improved our sex life for two months, and I've never been fitter, but now she complains I'm not keeping her company on the couch anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 767

You deserved it 191

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 711

You deserved it 5 228

Turntables

By Bill Mantie - 18/04/2021 02:00

Spicy

Today, after months of successfully taking strides to boost my long diminished libido, I found out my girlfriend, who always had a healthy sex drive, has now lost hers. Oh, how the tables have turned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 137

You deserved it 151

By Anonymous - 22/08/2015 09:44 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my wife accused me of cheating. Why? Because I recently started working out, and according to her, no married man tries to improve his physique unless he's trying to look good for other women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 443

You deserved it 4 655

Leg day

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 02:06

Today, after waiting a year, I asked a coworker who I like to work out at the gym with me. She said yes. I figured this would be the perfect place to show off my body and impress her. In every exercise we did, she lifted more weights than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 2 783

By Nowajerk - 25/12/2011 01:15 - Australia

Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 647

You deserved it 17 660

By mattttbob - 04/02/2012 10:16 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 523

You deserved it 36 037

Side effects

By Anonymous - 10/12/2020 23:01 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, I’ve been horny for weeks on end. Because I’m on antidepressants, I can’t orgasm, so the horniness won’t go away. The only thing I do is go to the gym, where literally EVERYONE seems fuckable. While I’m not depressed anymore, my vagina is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 184

Work it!

By Anonymous - 21/08/2023 22:00 - Germany

Spicy

Today, my man said, "If you get more sore from your workouts than from having sex with me, I’m gonna cry!" Uhm… I do serious weight training, and in bed we both enjoy the missionary position, so… sorry for your ego, Honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 164

Next

Top comments

AmyPacheco 0

Wednesday 18 January 2012 8:44

Well I hope you stay loyal

UsEumYong 4

Wednesday 18 January 2012 8:47

Ohhhh Shes in for a nice visit ;)

Comments

CptObvious98 8

Monday 4 November 2013 0:54

I feel your pain op! I workout and I'm always horny.

NobodyGay 16

Thursday 17 July 2014 5:34

One night in Chyna can help you solve that problem.

Azrty_fml 0

Saturday 3 January 2015 20:26

Just wank

cdncw 20

Thursday 21 May 2015 16:29

Organize her some physical therapy - She's gonna need it the day after you finally see her...

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with a girl I had just met. After about five minutes in, she said she had to go to the bathroom, so we stopped and she left the room. After waiting around ten minutes, I decided to check if she was OK. The window was open. She was gone. FML

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You deserved it 36 624

Today, a screenshot of an old tweet of mine went viral. Unfortunately, it was completely taken out of context, thinking it was saying the opposite of what I actually meant, and now I’m trending on both “Libs of TikTok” and “Woke Watch” or whatever the fuck. FML

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The Top

Today, I took a pretty nasty fall on the ice and made noises similar to the ones my dad makes when he's in pain. I am officially becoming old. FML

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You deserved it 154

Today, after being repeatedly talked into meeting my mother and grandmother for lunch, when they were done they tried to convince me to let my grandmother move into my house, for the second time in a year. FML

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You deserved it 69

Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 462

You deserved it 1 860

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I was "changing too much." My big change was a haircut. FML

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You deserved it 154

Today, at my job, I was so tired and aggravated that I accidentally mumbled, "I need a drink." One of the patients I was taking care of heard me and said, "Me too." I work at an addiction rehab facility. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 2 919

Today, I applied for a job at a local store. As I walked out the door, I heard the manager read it out loud and everybody else laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 527

You deserved it 2 694