Kids: Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't...

By Chin... uh.... - 10/05/2016 22:42 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 795

You deserved it 1 512

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Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/11/2011 05:23 - United States

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 685

You deserved it 4 760

By mustabeendrugs - 14/10/2013 01:14 - United States - Tucson

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 282

You deserved it 3 719

By kaichennnxx - 17/03/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 260

You deserved it 31 955

By FML - 15/05/2012 19:02 - Finland

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 979

You deserved it 8 599

By ChickenBallsPlease - 28/01/2014 11:16 - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 581

You deserved it 16 652

We all hate cold callers

By Adrian - 03/02/2022 14:01

Today, while working at my call center, I took a phone call. The guy on the other line just yelled "FUCK YOU!" twice at the top of his lungs before hanging up on me. But of course, the phone agent is always at fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 23/06/2014 19:52 - United States

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 699

You deserved it 6 042

By damniphone - 29/06/2013 05:31 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 108

You deserved it 8 715

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 17:38 - Ireland

Today, I realised I spend more time and receive more satisfaction talking on the phone with Chinese take away than talking to my wife in person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 168

You deserved it 23 572

By Anonymous - 23/04/2016 03:26 - United States

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, all because he heard me speaking Arabic. I was on the phone with my grandmother in Egypt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 856

You deserved it 1 696

fushengyuan 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:26

FREEEDOM!!!!!

A1NoSauce 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:33

It's okay, OP. They're still pretty normal by American standards.

Comments

fushengyuan 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:26

FREEEDOM!!!!!

Marshallino 21

Wednesday 11 May 2016 21:25

That was epic.

bheaze 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:29

Messing with foreigners 101.

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:30

Next time say ching chong ching ching shnabalaba ding dong.

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:35

No... Ok I'll see my self out. :(

dlToTlb 10

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:41

delete this to save me from clicking dislike

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:45

How do you delete comments on here I'm new to this

Hijacker101 12

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:31

They might have confused USA with Scotland.

BiGTiMeNeRD 29

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:16

I get it. The movie Braveheart.

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:29

nice reference

tj4234 35

Wednesday 11 May 2016 18:19

Nah, we don't phone people. We're too drunk for that.

A1NoSauce 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:33

It's okay, OP. They're still pretty normal by American standards.

embarass 14

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:42

Maybe they're making fun of America lol

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:56

They got it all wrong, they should have said MURICA!!!

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:31

MURICA FREEEEDOM!!

toolazytotype99 18

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:11

Maybe they just like Mel Gibson

ezrocks4u 29

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:19

'Least they didn't call you an "Amerifat"?

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:32

or American't even though AMERICA is a continent lol not a country

ABlindMan 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 20:11

Can't tell if trolling or just stupid...

freddygasman 18

Wednesday 11 May 2016 20:32

maybe a bit of both

havahnegila 22

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:33

At least it's not a bad word !

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The Top

Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 464

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did I remembered there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper; he never did, and came out without socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 528

You deserved it 5 802

The Top

Today, I went to the dentist and found out I still have a wisdom tooth. I got all four out last summer… or at least I thought I did. Now I have to go back and get it removed. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 337

You deserved it 198

Today, I was running late for work. I was trying to find my car keys, then realized I'd left them in my boyfriend's car. My phone charger was locked in my car, and my phone was dead. I couldn’t get hold of my boss and explain what had happened. I’m fired, aren’t I? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 595

Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 223

You deserved it 2 764

Today, after spending three hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 834

You deserved it 1 859

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 926

You deserved it 9 739

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 306

You deserved it 5 086

Same thing different taste

We all hate cold callers

Top comments

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